Podcast – Episode 0329 – Creating Joyfulness In Your Life

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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about using a system thinking approach to create joyfulness in your life.

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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about using a system thinking approach to create joyfulness in your life. #joy

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Showing 6 comments
  • Jeff Klassen

    I can see how different pieces of my life are fitting together. I reference the Big Five personality traits and myself as an INFJ. Especially my co-pilot. I think my Fe or Harmony is connected to the trait agreeableness. It is exactly at this point that so much hinges. Without my conscientiousness trait no work would get done. Without my agreeableness I couldn’t relate to people.

    Thank you for your effort you guys take to unpack concepts. I appreciate It!

  • Laurel

    Thank you so much for doing an episode on this concept, everytime Joel brings it up I end up listening to the sound bytes repeatedly hoping to suck out more information about the process.

    Personally it brought up A LOT of repressed emotions that have been brewing for a while, as an ENTP I’ve actually kind of had a F*** the world mentality and using joyfulness most of my life almost as a weapon against others. Wanting to instead play almost devil’s advocate for others personal power to enable themselves to enact joyfulness in their life, this doesn’t always go over well.

    I really think ExTPs actually have a lot of leverage here in manipulating their own joyfulness if they respect their own (and others) emotions long enough to sit with them and parcel out the root of each emotional stream of consciousness. Based on this episode, it actually seems like Antonia is outsourcing the “feely stuff” to Joel, and sticking to her Ti guns. Given that this is such a game-changer for personal development, it seems like something that is worth sucking at for a long time, since the payout is so good once you reach the point of optimal brainwashing. The problem here is the time, and just general head beating this seems to entail, plus the fact that it is so much more fun to play in other people’s sandboxes.

    One thing that I also disagree with is the idea that children inherently believe that others are responsible for their happiness. Although that seems true at a very early age, when there is no division between self & everything else. As kids learn that distinction they are hypnotized by their own power over objects, sounds, and their parents & siblings. For me, I distinctly remember having an unerring sense of joyfulness as a kid that family to this day still comments on, to me when I was 3-10 everything was a game that I had the rulebook to. During middle school-college my general effervescence was met with actual disgust from peers (that whole extroverted too much muchness), that really broke down that confidence in my own personal frame of thinking.

    Trying to learn how to build the joyful backbone back up again now, to bolster self-care and maintenance has been challenging. There is a really desperate Fe want to show off, talk a HUGE game, and go for flashy accomplishments, that eventually leave me feeling completely empty. The best and hardest thing is to simply keep my mouth shut and let my work do the talking, the instances where this has actually happened are few and far between.

    If any of this made any sense, I would love to know if either of you have faced any of these concerns or challenges:
    -Having enough confidence in your physical work to display it (also what would you consider your physical work,) without feeling the need to cover it with verbal explanations or disclaimers.
    -Fears of getting close with others since you might show your joy (or lack thereof), and it might make them feel bad about their circumstances or emotional reaction.
    -Understanding the Extroverted muchness, and knowing that you might be draining the introverts that you care about… how can we be close but together, without it being too much?

    Thank you again for addressing this, listening to the podcast again for the third time. Anymore follow-up thoughts should probably be a journal entry, but thanks for reading!

  • Izzy

    Joel- “Joy is a platform to feel other emotions from”

    Antonia- “Yea… I don’t know what that means, we’ll have to deconstruct that in a second” 😂😂

    Is there such a thing as too abstract? What happens if you go too abstract? Would we just not be able to understand or would our minds get fried?

    Joy to me feels like a sense of inner and outer alignment… like there is no resistance in my energy channels, even if it’s pushing up or taking in some yucky stuff.

    I was also wondering about your Ti lenses and the questioning of the lens In order to spot biases, Antonia.
    I’m not sure if I am going to be able to articulate this very well but I’ll give it a go.
    Do you have an almost infinite number of lenses to look through and question? Or do you question the same ones over and over again? In my mind I’m like, how many biases are there to question lol. I would love to hear more about this though.

    If I come across a Ti framework in my mind that makes the world and my experience not good (leads to existential nihilism). I’m just like “nope, that one doesn’t work for me” and I put on a different set of glasses. I can still hold some not very pleasant truths without making it my focus.

    Every winter a few miles from where I live there is a nature reserve that Starlings use as a stop off point in their migration. The murmurations are one of the most epic things I’ve ever witnessed, I actually felt like I was flying with them. I was reminded of this by your talk of a shoal of fish. https://youtu.be/GQ5DA_Z1X5s

    I watch sponge bob with my son!! Who would have a thought a sea sponge could be so wise🤣.

    Joel, I cannot comment on your thoughts at the beginning of the podcast about an event that went a little awry as it makes me laugh too much!

    I hope you are all well😊

  • Wendy Linn

    ENTP here. No insights here as ENTPs don’t need results to create inner states. As far as people-dependent joy, ENTPs don’t find themselves wrapped up in that either (esp. female who are a pretty low percentage.) But an “emergent system” design is a complete carrot for me. The rust in my system is always MEMORY-contingent (car diagram.) After listening, I decided the use of an egg timer would turn my world upside down and turn drudge into joy.

    I’ll let you know how it goes because I choose choosing.

    Great job guys.

  • Chris Hughes

    INTJ here.

    I was reminded of a movie “Life Is Beautiful”, about a man who was captured by Nazis and sent to Auschwitz along with his son. He made all the hard labor and punishment into a game/contest for the benefit of his son, saying that the winner at the end would win a tank.

    Yes it is all about perspective, and learning to keep an undercurrent of quiet contentment through all difficulty. Like Antonia, I prefer the terms “quiet contentment” or “inner peace” to “joyfulness”. It took me decades, but was all worth it.

  • Jasmyn

    Intp here. What’s coming up for me is the concept of “what doesn’t kill me makes me stronger”. Framing challenges and even traumas as something that serves you or brings benefit to you, teaches you lessons, or builds strength. It’s hard to look at it that way in the midst of it all, of course, but in hindsight I love to look at my past traumas as something that has made me strong and wise. When someone in my life is going through something, I love to share some of my past traumas and reveal that I got through it and now feel gratitude towards them because I’m such a strong and wise person now. One may call it desensitized but I call it wisdom and strength.

    Also, I love how Antonia pointed out the wheel of emotions being an aha moment for thinkers. It’s so true! I spent so much time researching and analyzing this concept. Of course i probably took it too far (hyperfocusing on it), but nevertheless the concept gave me so much insight. I loved your episode on the movie “inside out” for this reason. That’s a very “lite” version of the concept, but is a great introduction to the deeper concept. If I ever have children I am definitely going to use that film as a resource for them.

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