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PHQ | QUESTIONS FROM COMMUNITY: In this episode, Joel and Antonia answer a question about INFJs being the rarest type.
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PHQ | QUESTIONS: "Perspectives" Used By INFJ vs INTJ
PHQ | QUESTIONS: Basic Model For Incremental Personal Growth
24 comments
What I want to know is why, after learning anything about INFJs, anyone would want to be one. We are known for having pain. Being an INFJ has not been fun. I’d love to be another type.
I have taken the various online Myers-Briggs test over the years and find that my personality type does not come out the same all the time. I am wondering if another reason INFJs are scientifically registering as such a small percentage is because of the INFJ tendency to see the world through others eyes.
Most of the time I come out as an INFJ, but I have gotten INTJ once and INFP a few times. It wasn’t until reading the descriptions of how the different types are wired, that I both felt comfortable describing myself as an INFJ and realized my answers were sometimes reflective of other people my mind wandered to while taking the test. For example, I have a close friend who encouraged me to take the Myers-Briggs test in the first place who would not tell me what he was beforehand, but I came back telling him I tested as an INFJ or an INFP and he turned out to be an INFP.
Hi, thank you for your excellent work! Like just about everybody, I’m INFJ :-).
I believe you’re missing one reason that INFJ:s behave like bullies towards the “fake unicorns”: Often these mistyped forum members are INFP:s. And while we share a lot of experiences and have plenty in common, I’m convinced that most INFJ:s have a hard time with Fi/Authenticity. It grates and grates against our Fe, and in my experience Fi users are the ones I can really lose my civility with. And especially INFP:s. To us, their Authenticity, the constant need to have a subjective opinion about everything, feels selfish and judgemental. So, when too much Fi shows up in a forum where INFJ:s are opening up and being vulnerable, I believe it can be quite painful for us. (The way I see it, INFJs are rarely aware of even having subjective opinions, and when we do, we feel quite pretentious for it).
I have an INFP sister, and I was married to an INTJ for fifteen years. I love them both very much, we have excellent conversations and shared values around most things. And yet, I experience total emotional exhaustion after being around either of them for too long. I’ve learned not to open up emotionally around them because I inevitably get hurt, through no fault of theirs, just “emotional incompatibility”. And often, I’m the one who ends up being mean and behaving badly, despite the fact (which they’ll readily admit) that I’m normally a lot more skilled as a people person.
That is an awesome personal growth exercise, Steven! I think there is huge leverage in the simple act of tracing our reactions back to their onset and questioning whether or not they are still necessary. Thanks for your comment. It was just the right size. ;)
Thanks for the feedback, Kristi! I’m glad you are using our content as a springboard to discover things about yourself. That is how it is intended. :)
ENTP week is coming.