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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about masculinity and fatherhood.

In this podcast you’ll find:

  • This podcast episode talks about the importance of fathers in the family and society.
  • How are fathers seen in the society? Is the role of the father imperative, what is its importance? How do we perceive masculinity and fatherhood nowadays?
  • 2 reasons why it’s challenging for some fathers to take the role:
  1. There are many people who grew up without dads.
  2. The way fatherhood looks now is different than the previous generation.
  • There are a lot factors that changed the dynamics of the modern family. The modern family is not a traditional family anymore because there are different variations now. For example, parents who are both working, some have blended families, some have children who came from previous parents, etc.
  • There was almost an implication that men are sperm donors.
  • The conversation about what moms and dads must be almost feel archaic and should be focused on masculine and feminine ‘energies’. We both have these types of energies inside of us and the interplay of both is what’s very important.
  • Feminine Energy – movement oriented and creative.
  • Masculine Energy – very still, present and creates a safe place for the feminine energy to dance.
  • Women are hypnotically beautiful in their dance. The container is created (masculine energy) so it can appreciate the hypnotic beauty that’s exuded by the feminine energy.
  • Women, when seeking a mate, rests into the container knowing they are safe in expressing their feminine energy.
  • You can have men that have a strong feminine energy and women that radiates masculine energy.
  • The energy does not necessarily imply the gender, although there is a correlation between the two. What works beautifully is the balance between the two energies.
  • In most cases, fathers are expected to show a masculine energy but they don’t have a sense of permission that it’s okay for them to do it.
  • If you are a single parent, regardless if you’re a father or a mother, and you got nobody in your life to help balance it, that doesn’t mean that your kid(s) will grow ill-adjusted.
  • If you can identify what your predominant energy is, ask yourself how you can balance that out. Seek assistance from other people (aunt, brother or sister) and find someone who can bring/emanate the energy.
  • The concept of masculine energy as represented by males are not necessary needs to be re-evaluated.
  • For fathers – The stage of masculinity and fatherhood can be challenging but don’t give up thinking that you’re wrong or bad as a father with a strong masculine presence. It’s not something to apologize. Express it with self-authority and not with a domineering presence.
  • For mothers – It is easy to see masculinity and fatherhood as a clump of oppression. True and authentic masculine energy is not going to behave in an oppressive way. Resisting all forms of masculinity will not yield good results. It’s a matter of being good at identifying true masculinity as opposed to an immature version of dominance.

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  • Jay Eimer
    • Jay Eimer
    • November 28, 2017 at 3:07 am

    A female expressing the masculine energy – the momma bear defending her children (where traditionally “security” of the home is the masculine role). But if the masculine is present, the “better” expression of the relationship is the masculine to secure the home to ENABLE the feminine to be expressive and nurturing.

    In single parent homes, the parent present has to be both (as Joel did during his stint with young boys – brings out the feminine side). What’s missing in many female single parent families (and also some lesbian couples) is the lack of a secure boundary.

    Two feminines (not necessarily two females, could be a woman and a wimpy man) is lots of expression and emotion but no security. Two masculines is the opposite – lots of security, but only through repressive “rules” that will drive children to rebellion.

    I’m a GenX with baby boomer parents who divorced when I was 10. Being beyond the toddler age, and as my father was a secure breadwinner and my mom had no career, in a rare case, my dad got custody. My dad immediately remarried, but I didn’t get along with my step-mother – so lots of “disciplinarian” oppression and little nurturing. And every other weekend, spent with my (now a professional) mother being the breadwinner for a henpecked “house husband”. Now I’m 53 and just now coming to terms with the results of my teenage rebellion against both paradigms.

  • Charis Branson
    • Charis Branson
    • July 20, 2015 at 8:30 pm

    Thank you for your authentic feedback, Jerrod! Congratulations on being an expectant father. I’m sure you will be fabulous!

  • Jerrod
    • Jerrod
    • July 20, 2015 at 3:53 pm

    Thanks for keeping an honest and open dialogue. These questions are often on my mind as an expectant father, who is trying to do his best to appreciate his father and his flaws, but also improve and become my own man. Sometimes these concepts and notions get lost in the cultural and political battles that play out in culture. There is nothing liberal or conservative about fatherhood, it is a common human need and experience. Thanks for trying to bridge the gap, and move past the duality that sometimes sullies our culture and divides us from one another. Great insights! Congrats on being parents!

  • Joel Mark Witt
    • Joel Mark Witt
    • August 26, 2014 at 4:17 pm

    Thank you Bill for the comment and for listening. We would love to hear any insights you come up with in addition to these.

  • Bill Parravano
    • Bill Parravano
    • August 26, 2014 at 1:46 pm

    Awesome podcast! You two really hit the nail on the head with this one. This was really applicable for me right now…Thank you…Bill

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