Podcast - Episode 0374 - How Childhood Trauma Impacts Your Relationships (with Bruce Muzik)

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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk with guest host Bruce Muzik about the tools to overcome childhood traumas that are showing up in your relationships.

• Bruce Muzik of Love at First Fight.
• What are ACEs Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) (cdc.gov)>, and how are they affecting our relationships?
  • The huge impact our childhoods have on our lives.
  • Why there is a direct link that predicts disease in our adult life.
  • What is affecting our potential relationship satisfaction.
  • What a low vs high ACE score means.
  • Why certain ACE scores are tied to alcoholism, chronic depression, smoking, autoimmune diseases and more.
  • How many ACEs did Joel and Antonia have?
• So you have ACEs…now what?
  • Why healing from trauma is possible and faster than you think.
  • How these particular trauma therapies are changing lives.
  • Why this time period in history is set for healing trauma.
  • The burgeoning science of healing trauma.
  • Why talk therapy isn’t the best option to deal with trauma.
  • Where our trauma is actually stored.
  • Bessel van der Kolk’s book, The Body Keeps the Score.
• The real thing that is most damaging to people beyond the actual trauma.
• What our emotions actually need to do.
• How is trauma affecting our relationships?
  • Which couples struggle the most in their relationships?
  • What Bruce experienced in his marriage.
  • What safety in our relationship really means.
  • When we have cortisol pumping in our veins consistently.
  • Why kissing your wife goodbye in the morning is such a big deal.
• Why we all actually have trauma.
  • Capital “T” Trauma vs lowercase “t” trauma.
  • The one thing we all have to do.
  • How attachment styles tie in with trauma. (Check out this episode with Bruce on attachment theory )
• Where to get help.
  • What is complex trauma?
  • Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker.
  • The Crappy Childhood Fairy (Anna Runkle).
  • Finding EMDR and trauma therapists at www.trauma.info
• What do we do to handle trauma in others?
  • When is challenge vs gentleness appropriate?
  • Why personal growth leaders need to understand trauma.
  • The model Bruce uses to grow through what we’ve gone through.
  • What men need more vs what women need.
  • Bruce’s experience of how to support and yet challenge.
• Why labeling our partners can cause more problems than help.
  • When blaming stops our progress.
  • What focusing on the self does for you and your relationship.
  • This important thing you need to learn.

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