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In this episode, Joel and Antonia compare how feelers and thinkers experience feelings and talk about which type is more emotional.

In this podcast you’ll find:

  • Are feelers more emotional than thinkers? The online buzz surrounding this question.
  • What’s the difference between experiencing emotions and using a feeling function to make decisions?
  • The degree of separation between feeling the emotion and making the decision for feelers.
  • Thinkers – what’s the difference between thought and a thinking function?
  • Is there a greater gap between our thoughts and thinking function than there is between our emotions and our feeling function?
  • Joel’s experience as a feeler – does he feel more emotional than thinkers?
  • Antonia’s experience with thoughts and feelings as a Accuracy (Ti) user.
  • The pendulum swing – how the world has shifted from over-valuing thinking to over-valuing feeling.
  • The myth that all feelings should be acted upon – why it’s important to develop a mature relationship with your feelings.
    • How feeling types can be cavalier with emotional data
    • Some differences between Authenticy (Fi) and Harmony (Fe)
  • How emotions motivate thinkers.
  • How we’re wired to be intrinsically rewarded for using our preferred functions.
  • What does it look like when a feeler has well-developed emotional intelligence?
  • What are emotional “triggers”?
  • Looking at SpongeBob SquarePants as an example of personal agency.
  • Why feelers make their best decisions based on emotional criteria – and how, ironically, they can appear less emotional when they do this.
  • Some thoughts on the intellectualization of emotions.
  • Why we need to process feelings of guilt and shame.

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22 comments

  • Justine G
    • Justine G
    • July 14, 2021 at 11:04 am

    I somewhat regret using rape as a example of ‘you caused me suffering’, as I realise it is a physical act with sometimes big physical consequences such as unwanted pregnancy, disease and other physical harm. This makes it a problematic example.

    The point was it is not my observation that people only condemn others for ‘physical’ harm caused to others. Of course you yourself have a role in how you manage how you feel about it afterwards, I’m just worried about the over-simplistic-sounding message delivered here (and elsewhere).

    The point is that the message ‘you are entirely responsible for your own emotions and suffering’ implies no responsibility on the part of others to at least try to be decent and considerate. It may not have been Joel’s intention but it came across (to me) in a black and white way, when it is actually very nuanced.

  • Antonia Dodge
    • Antonia Dodge
    • July 15, 2021 at 7:47 pm

    Hi, Justine. Every once in our podcasting history Joel has made this statement and someone has gotten salty, so we recorded this episode a while back to talk about what he means when he says, “We’re responsible for our emotions.” There’s some conversation in the comment section, as well as a link to a video he made:

    https://personalityhacker.com/podcast-episode-0138-can-you-control-your-emotions/

    I’m not saying you’ll like or agree with the episode / take, but it does give a wee bit more context to the thought process.

    A

  • Justine G
    • Justine G
    • July 13, 2021 at 8:32 pm

    Forgive me if I’ve got the wrong end of the stick here, but if not I’m truly appalled that you would, for example, imply that we have no responsibility whatsoever for what others feel.

    Why do you suppose it is considered unacceptable for people to post nasty and abusive comments online, like on this website?

    Why do you suppose that rape is nearly universally condemned? Okay it can cause considerable physical pain and that is part of the reason, but that is not the only reason it is condemned!

    We also condemn it because someone played a huge part in someone else suffering a terrible emotional pain that was avoidable. Implying it is somehow the victim’s fault for ‘allowing’ themselves to feel terrible, well then why even say it is a crime unless they have suffered physical pain?

    I am also appalled at the massive contradiction in our culture at large whereby, on the one hand, we are all fully ‘responsible’ for our feeling reactions, but NOT when it comes to ‘political incorrectness’! Then it is totally everyone else’s responsibility to not offend anyone else’s feelings, even if unintended!

    How on earth is anyone supposed to compute this massive inconsistency!

  • Anne-Sofie
    • Anne-Sofie
    • July 10, 2021 at 9:48 am

    I very much agree. The same can be said about Ti.

  • Anonymous
    • Anonymous
    • July 13, 2021 at 10:40 am

    “The pendulum swing – how the world has shifted from over-valuing thinking to over-valuing feeling.”

    This is not an accident. This is a concerted effort by the psychopaths who own and control everything in the world to dumb people down, turn off their in-built bullshit detector, make people incapable of critical thinking and debunking their lies, and make them emotionally reactive, miserable, sick, and dysfunctional. These criminal psychopaths are experts in mentally manipulating the people of the world, and they have learned that they can disable people’s critical thinking through emotional manipulation.

    Look at the social justice whackjobs on Twitter: totally valuing feelings backing up their false ideas about life over facts, intuition, and logic; hostile and violent against anyone who debunks the lies of their woke cult or daring to contradict their cult or think differently; racist and even violent against white men; hating men and masculinity; promoting non-white supremacy over whites; promoting female supremacy over men; promoting sexual dysfunction and degeneracy. If you want to see the valuing of feeling over thinking, just read the insane nonsense of these crazy and deeply unhappy people on Twitter.

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