Podcast - Episode 0013 - Making Scary Changes In Your Life

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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about making scary changes in your life when you are ready to “scale up” in personal development.

In this podcast you’ll find:

• Talking about ‘scale up’ moments, which are scary even if we know it would be good for us.
• The character Neo in the move “The Matrix” is a great example of letting go of others expectations and scaling up by resting into his own sense of integrity.
• We face moments when we realize ‘what got us here won’t get us there’.
• Transitions aren’t just scary, they’re also painful.
• Based on ancient programming, a part of us fears that if we fail after the transition we’ll literally die.
• The scariest part isn’t the transition; it’s the initial decision of making big change.
• The transition is usually more frustration and painful. You have to pick up new skills and one learns things about themselves that may not be flattering.
• When we finish the process, we almost always look back and say “That wasn’t so bad.”
• A helpful model is the HAT model – Healing, Achievement and Transcendence.
• When we’re scaling up, we’re putting more pressure through the ‘pipe’ and more cracks are exposed. We mistake this new self-understanding with a belief that we’re broken and not ready for the next level.
• Going through the transition is what exposed the cracks in the first place, so it’s all a healthy part of the process.
• Once you get to the next ‘vine’ you feel so accomplished.
• It’s easy to blame outside circumstances to mask the fear of scaling up, or to believe that no one will help you during the process.
• Alternatively, it’s healthier to see oneself as responsible for transitions and also find mentors and coaches to help during the process.
• It takes balls and determination and persistence to make big changes in life.
• Some have the problem of being in transition too much and have trouble sticking with just one thing, which can be its own challenge.
• Having the strength often comes by doing the thing you’re madly in love with doing.
• It’s important to really know what you want, and avoid ‘counterfeit’ desires.
• Some people end up in ‘satellite’ careers – something close to their heart’s desire, but one step removed.
• Surrounding yourself with people who are already where you want to go helps you get to your end game faster, and proves it can be done with ‘dying’.
• It’s also important not to mistake lateral change with vertical growth.
• Being able to make big transitions is the first step toward playing a Bigger Game.
• Familiarity can keep one in bad, sometimes dangerous, situations.
• All growth happens out of our comfort zone, so comfort isn’t always our friend.

Exercises we recommend in this podcast:

Spend time every day writing 3 pages of ‘stream of consciousness’ writing to mine your mind for what you truly want.

Things we reference in this podcast:

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