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In this episode Joel and Antonia dive deep into the needs and desires of the INFJ personality type.
In this podcast on the INFJ Personality Type you’ll find:
- This podcast episode talks about the INFJ personality type
- We have an unusually high number of INFJs represented in Personality Hacker
- INFJs have the tendency to feel very misunderstood.
- 2 important components to understand INFJs:
- Their mental process is called ‘Perspectives’. They’re actually watching their own mind work and form patterns. Because this isn’t something verifiable, other people just don’t believe them or reject what they radiate.
- INFJs pair Perspectives with Harmony. When a person with the INFJ personality type tries to figure out what to do, the first thing that pops in their mind is, “how do we make sure everybody’s needs are met?” This process is in tuned with unspoken social contracts that we accept.
- INFJs are very sensitive to the emotions of other people that they end up absorbing them.
- The more sensitive they are, the more they have the tendency hiding. The less expressive they get, the more pain they experience.
- It’s difficult for the INFJ personality type to build intimacy with another person.
- INFJs who are developed and growth oriented don’t retreat to coldness. They’ve taken the harmony process in order to understand and create healthy boundaries.
- INFJs are also able to see how things will play out in the future and this is one of the reasons why they are hesitant to build intimacy with other people.
- Because they are so aware of what’s going on with the other person, they end up having one-sided relationships.
- Jesus of Nazareth, Gandhi and Martin Luther King Jr were probably INFJs.
- INFJs are not in the receiving end in victimization. They have extraordinary capabilities within them.
- If you are an INFJ personality type or know someone who is, here are a few things you need to note:
- You don’t have to absorb other people’s emotions and have it stay there. You need to develop techniques to let it go.
- Words have power and the way you describe yourself will become your reality. Change the way you talk about yourself and think of ways of being a co-creator. Create a reality that’s positive to you. If you change the word use, you can change reality.
- When getting everybody’s needs met, you’re basically part of everybody. Getting your needs met means you take care of yourself. Get sensitive to what those needs are in real time.
- Honor what you need in the moment and be willing to take care of it. This will help you get other’s needs met.
- Continue to look for people who understand you. Allow yourself to be understood and form the relationships you’ve been desiring.
- You can’t change that you’re going to absorb people’s emotions. Manage and learn strategies that will help you figure out a way to let the energy come in and go out.
- Do what you can to see yourself as a person who has positive things to contribute to the world. Focus what you got as gift and not as a burden to others.
Helpful resources for the INFJ personality type:
Developing Your INFJ Personality Type (by Donna Dunning)
The INFJ Personality Type (by Dr. A.J. Drenth)
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304 comments
Definitely rare! Being left handed most likely helps you tap into your creative side easier, but most likely contributes to feeling even more ‘different’ and misunderstood. Fortunately, there are ways to understand the complete ‘you’ including your personality type, brain hemisphere preference, your experiences, values and interests. You don’t have to feel perpetually misunderstood, even if you are truly unique.
A
I’ve always wondered what role being left-handed has played in my development as an INFJ.
I am a left-handed, male, INFJ. That’s got to be pretty rare, right?
This is fantastic. I’m INFJ and a lot of the issues raised really resonate with me. Within the first 1/4 of the podcast I decided this would be fantastic for my INFP dad to listen to. We are similar in a lot of ways, however boundaries and expectations can be an issue that I personally find very hard to communicate with him, especially since many of the boundaries I often think about implementing concern his ESTJ partner and my miscommunication with her.
As I’ve grown older, receiving the same space for emotional support FROM him as I provide TO him has become a challenge but my way of dealing with this was to understand that this is not as fundamental to his personality as it is to mine, and luckily I have an INFJ friend and INFJ partner, both of whom can accommodate this need that I have.
Thanks for this, I think it will be extremely useful.
(INFJ) Thank you so much for this! :)
Demystifying nF dominants (INFJ)
1. May come across as intimidating
2. May become socially isolated through fixating on meaning which is mostly not obvious to others
3. Mostly concerned with formally perfect idealisation of human existence
4. Potential stressors are when their ideas aren’t effectively communicated, recognised or accepted
5. Need support to find their own way of communicating ideas
6. May become resigned to never being understood owing to previous experience of constant miscommunication on their part or misunderstandings on others’ part
7. Helpful to remember the connections they make between the consequences of different ideas aren’t necessarily obvious to others
8. Helpful to remember the meaning they attach to different ideas or words aren’t necessarily obvious to others, either.
9. Amass large amounts of inference, meanings and potential metaphysical causes in their heads
10. May come across as operating on a different, mostly inaccessible plane
11. Helpful for others to remember they’re not psychic
12. Some difficulties in communication arise when their language is obscure to others: this is mostly when they don’t spell out what is obvious to them, though not obvious to others.
13. Maybe deeply insecure through being treated as other to everyone else (because of others’ reactionary fear to their coming across as operating on a different, mostly inaccessible plane)
14. Maybe also deeply insecure through being discredited as irrelevant because of the highly abstracted nature of their thinking patterns
15. In conclusion helpful for others to remember they have emotional needs like everyone else and they’re not completely emotionally independent howsoever they may come across.
16. Introverted intuiting means their intuiting may come across as a kind of thinking, however they are equally as sensitive to suggested meaning, tone, and motivation in others as other intuiting-feeling types.
Development of the types
1. In reality each of the types need their two least dominant neurological functions as much as they need to operate freely in their first two dominant neurological functions.
2. For example, as an nF dominant I will feel constricted if I can’t operate freely in my first two dominant neurological functions, introverted intuiting (n) and extraverted feeling (F).
3. However, my two least dominant neurological functions are introverted sensing (s) and extraverted thinking (T). This means I am least confident operating in something which requires especial attentiveness or tactical thinking from me.
4. This also means I may easily come across to others as especially, awkwardly inattentive or untactical.
5. An awareness of one another’s first two dominant neurological functions and two least dominant neurological functions can help us become more sensitive towards one another’s perspective.
6. I know this has helped me come to terms with my experience of growing up with people whose perspective I didn’t completely understand.
Nope, i am from france why?