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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about knowing the difference between idealism making us happy vs idealism causing us pain.

In this podcast on Idealism you’ll find:

  • How does idealism help us? How do you live with your ideals even if it seems unrealistic?
  • The idealism that we have when we want something so bad, we reach to a point where we ignore what’s realistic.
  • Sometimes an idealistic perspective will be contextually unrealistic but it doesn’t mean that it’s in general unrealistic.
  • Intuitives bring idealism across the world. How does idealism help us move forward? How does it block progress?
  • There are limitations with being idealistic.
  • We have these things that come in our lives, they seem to drive us forward but some of our ideals are unrealistically idealistic on the USA’s political scheme.
  • Just how thoughtful are we in our idealism? How granular or specific are we in terms of our ideals?
  • Where are we putting idealism around? Is it around things that should have ethical positive/negative activity associated with it? Or is it around things that are considered as neutral?
  • When we are creating our ideals, it’s really easy to overvalue how many contexts our ideals are appropriate within. We carry our idealism no matter what the situation is and sometimes our ideals are very tied to the situation.
  • For most people, they end up being idealistic in the negative direction when it comes to self-image. For example: thinking that we’re not as smart, confident and capable compared to the average person.
  • One the most common idealisms today can be seen/experienced in social media. When people see celebrities, models, public figures and even their friends, they’d think that they’re not good enough.
  • When you use comparison as a tool, use it in a “matching” type of approach.
  • When you add comparison in idealism, it won’t serve the job.
  • When comparing yourself with other people, do it in a positive frame rather than in a negative way.
  • What are the right tools for the job when it comes to idealism? What is inspiring vs what is demoralizing? How are we responding to it?
  • If you feel inspired and energized when using the comparison tool, then you’re doing it correctly. If you feel demoralized and down, then you’re not doing it the right way.
  • Whatever idealism you have in the future; we don’t live in that world. That’s an image inside your head. You live right now.
  • Do you feel energized in your current state or do you feel demotivated?
  • Idealism sometimes feel good because it allows us to project our ideals in the world and feel right about them.
  • There will be situations where we feel negative emotions and yet even if we’re experiencing them, we can feel a sense of centeredness. We may not feel happiness at all contexts and situations, but we can feel peace.

Using Idealism to Create Happiness #happiness

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  • Tanya
    • Tanya
    • October 14, 2019 at 6:03 pm

    As an INFP, one of the most valuable lessons I’ve learned is to recognize when I’m idealizing something or someone and to step back and try to look at it from different perspectives. It has helped me grow, mature and gain wisdom. I feel more relaxed and peaceful in my private and personal world because of it.
    As far as purchasing Personality Hacker’s content, I highly recommend it. They have given me tons of valuable content for free and I’ve returned the favour by purchasing their products. They’ve given me tools to support my personal growth and I in return support them.

  • Antonia Dodge
    • Antonia Dodge
    • July 23, 2015 at 4:42 pm

    Hey, Brian – Thanks for the book recommendation. I’ll check it out.

    I’ve been thinking about why when we mention we have premium content people feel it’s uncomfortable and I’m starting to believe it’s not because we’re doing it ‘poorly’ but because we’re doing it well. That is, we’re personable and engaged and when we remind people this is a business it suddenly throws them out of frame of us being (in some fashion) friends.

    We’re a part of the next generation of businesses and marketing where a more personal tone is important to us and our audience, so I guess we’ll figure it out as we go. :)


  • Charis Branson
    • Charis Branson
    • July 17, 2015 at 8:51 pm

    Thanks for your wonderful feedback, Andy! I agree that the openness and vulnerability Antonia and Joel bring are truly unique and refreshing. Thanks for listening!

  • Charis Branson
    • Charis Branson
    • July 17, 2015 at 8:47 pm

    Thanks for the comment, Andy! I use a similar litmus test to you in that I must feel openness and motivation to do something before I can really get invested. If something is surrounded by dread or heaviness, I will usually find a way out. I’ve also noticed that certain key moments of my life have been surrounded by incredible motivation and ambition – whereas I am usually pretty passive – to the point that I wonder how I managed to conquer the many obstacles when it is all said and done. It’s almost like a part of my superconscious steps forward and goads me into action because it knows I need to accomplish whatever is laid out before me.

    Thanks for being a PH podcast listener!

  • Andy Spyros
    • Andy Spyros
    • July 17, 2015 at 1:39 am

    I really liked your litmus tests for decision making. As I pondered them more, I realized that for me it’s a combination of lightness and energy vs darkness and heaviness and I actually have a place in my body that I feel it. Wondering if for either of you dialing back those parameters you find something similar?

    What I heard you say, Antonia, when you were describing the sense of peace you felt around certain ideals was Truth for you, that deep sense of knowing what is right for you without needing to have anyone else believe the same. For me this is the easiest form of idealism to use as a guide…like a flashlight.

    My friend had just shared this quote with me (which you allude to): The reason we struggle with insecurity is because we compare our behind-the-scenes with everyone else’s highlight reel. Steve Furtick (but really who knows who said it LOL)
    Then we remembered that people look at us and think that very same thing! We’re their highlight reel (complete with pony-tailed children on every street corner) So remember, there are people out there looking at you that way!

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