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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about how to manage energy based on your personality type.
In this podcast you’ll find:
Time management isn’t always about managing time. It’s about managing energy.
The management of energy is key to understanding everything else we do. Energy is very important for us as people.
The world is plagued by stress and burnout.
This requires us to manage the information we take in, who we communicate with, and the way we manage priorities and to-do lists.
Time/energy management is not a one-size-fits-all approach.
What works for one person may not work for another.
Begin by making sure the energy in the food we take in is high quality and nutritious.
Make sure to get enough rest and R&R.
How does each type manage energy?
8 Cognitive Functions in MBTI system.
4 are perceiving processes – how we learn info. What we find interesting to observe and explore.
4 are judging functions – decision making. Natural vetting process to determine the value of things.
4 Cognitive Functions are particularly influential to each type. These we call the Cognitive Function Stack.
2 will be our biggest strengths – 2 will be our biggest weaknesses.
Each Cognitive Function has a mirror opposite. If you are using one function, its direct opposite will be getting ignored.
We spend 10,000+ hours working on our strengths.
Driver is dominant cognitive function. Flow State. How we see ourselves.
Copilot rounds us out and keeps us balanced. If Driver is an introverted perceiving process, the Copilot will be an extraverted judging process.
Copilot isn’t a flow state. It is a conscious process that doesn’t feel as good to use as the Driver. It is a growth process because it will round us out as individuals.
There are 2 passengers behind Driver and Copilot. Exact opposites of Driver and Copilot.
Behind Copilot is the 10 year old process. This is where we go to in times of defensiveness. It can become a very insidious energy drain.
Behind Driver is 3 year old process. This is the least sophisticated part of you. Don’t let it run the house, just get its occasional needs met.
Driver gives us energy when we are using it. This makes our energy needs unique to type.
Copilot has some skill. It can give us energy, but it can also rob us of energy.
Driver/Copilot used in tandem can create flow and huge amounts of energy.
Focusing on Copilot and singling it out as a growth exercise can cause fatigue. Like building muscle.
Stress can be caused by over engagement. Constantly burning hot. Inefficient energy loss.
Burnout is a lack of engagement. You’re done. Nothing left to give.
Stress comes when Driver is trying to solve the problem and it doesn’t have the right tool for the job.
Burnout happens when we don’t feel we are allowed to use our driver. If we are in a context where we can’t be in our Driver we won’t be able to regenerate our batteries. So we will eventually burnout.
(Stress and burnout can have causes unrelated to type (diet, nutrition, temporary life challenges, etc. If there are no obvious reasons for stress/burnout in life, then it is time to look at your Cognitive Functions and find out what is missing.)
Driver/Copilot form an unstoppable team.
If every day is a bad day then you may not be exercising your dominant process enough.
Create an environment that honors your Driver. Like the little daisy that pushes through concrete, our flow state will force its way to the surface.
- INFJ & INTJ: Driver is Ni – the opposite of Se. Ni works the best when it is not gettting sensory input. INxJs often complain of lifelong insomnia. If they aren’t honoring the needs of their Driver during the day, it will wait until they are quietly in bed before firing up and getting the attention it needs. This puts the person in flow and gives them energy which makes it hard for them to sleep. INxJs should allow themselves some sensory deprivation earlier in the day so their minds can relax when it’s time for bed.
Driver always needs to be supported.
- ESFP leads with Sensation. This process requires sensory stimulation. A job that removes sensory stimulation (desk jockey, cubicle rat, etc) will cause depression and fatigue to an ESFP. Solutions: Ride a bike to work, Play basketball with some friends at lunch, engage with the community in some team sports, go to the gym.
Strengthening the Copilot and gaining ability to use it in conjunction with the Driver give the Driver the adult companionship it needs.
Oftentimes, we find it more comfortable to pair our Driver with our 10 yr old. Driver will have either a Extraverted/Introverted attitude. Copilot rounds us out by having opposite I/E. 10 year old is opposite of Copilot, so it goes back to being of the same attitude as the Driver. So, it is easier to use at times than the Copilot.
We can cruise along like this for awhile, but eventually a barrier will occur that a child can’t help us overcome. As stress builds the 10 year old becomes more unreliable.
Look at exercising the Copilot as going to the gym. And using 10 year old sitting on the couch as eating potato chips.
Exercise gives us energy. Not exercising and eating fatty foods robs us of energy.
When you do decide to exercise or use your Copilot it may seem really hard at first, but the muscles grow and it becomes easier.
10 yr old can hijack us if it is completely ignored or dishonored in some way. Whatever is making the 10 yr old feel icky needs to be solved or it becomes an energy drain.
- Harmony – Fe – 10 yr old can feel “dirty” or dishonored if interpersonal relationships devolve somehow. It can hijack the Driver and Copilot – all mental and emotional real estate – until a resolution is reached.
- Effectiveness – Te – 10 yr old can feel dishonored if projects don’t get completed.
If there is something you need to handle and you aren’t handling it a lot of psychological energy will be drained.
- INTJs lead with Perspectives – Ni. Their Copilot is Te. 10 yr old is Authenticity – Fi. Fi is about how things impact the user on an emotional level. The average INTJ has a lot of protective mechanisms here, but if you dig down you may find a lot of offense or injury. To clean out Fi and get back into a fully functioning Te, the INTJ needs to remove the hurt pride or fear of injury. Energy can be drained by old pain.
- INxJs perfectionism usually comes down to a dishonored 10 yr old. INTJs Fi can be about artistic expressiveness, so to an INTJ it can show itself as “I’m the only one who can do it right!” INFJs 10 yr old is Accuracy – Ti. Precision. Perfectionism can be a massive energy hog.
Last process in car model is 3 yr old.
Top performers always need rest and the 3 yr old allows our Driver some time off.
We don’t want to live in the 3 yr old because it causes burnout.
But we can use it strategically and it gives our driver a much needed break.
Schedule time to be in 3 yr old.
- For a Memory (Si) inferior – watch old movies, listen to music from the past, read a favorite novel, look at old photographs, etc.
We can manage our energy by fully comprehending how our Cognitive Function Stack interacts and either robs or replaces energy.
Resources Referenced in this Podcast
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26 comments
Very good podcast. It hit me that stress does indeed come when people don’t want you to be in your driver process and try to get you to abandon it. When they’d prefer you to be another type and make you feel the odd one out for it. As an INFP I lead with introverted feeling and that has ruffled a lot of feathers. I don’t mean to ruffle people, but when I get deeply convicted about something there is no way I’m going with what the group wants me to do if it makes no sense to me.
I can also vouche for growing the co pilot really changing me. Before I knew any of these functions I went off to college 3 yrs ago at age 35 with a 13 yr old as a single mom. Moved 7 hrs north in Ontario and I have never been the same. It changed my life to explore new surroundings, the francophone culture and learn about plights I had no idea existed. Basically it changed the course of my life and I switched my school focus to northern economic community development. I’ve been exploring ever since and going to new places and wouldn’t rule out living in Churchill Mb or Nunavut even someday.
I’m an INFP and to grow my 3 year old process of extroverted Thinking, I copy-paste people who use it as a primary or secondary cognitive function. I have ISTJ, INTJ and ENTJ mentors who, to me, represent a healthy and successful version of their personality type. I observe how they use their extroverted Thinking function (primary function for ENTJs. secondary for ISTJs and INTJs) and try to identify processes I can use in my life or daily routine. It works best with my ISTJ friend as she uses Si and Te, which is the order in which I would use these judging functions. For instance, I observe how she organizes her studies and her household. I then “copy-paste” a few essentials and readjust them so they better fit my organisation.
As an INTJ, you and I have the same Driver and 3 Year Old, so this may help you. I got into this amazing flow state once when I was copying some information. I was in a quiet room, no distractions, and it seemed to distract me physically, while not requiring any mental real estate. It was like I gave my eyes and hands something to do, and my brain just disengaged. It started processing all this information I’d been absorbing from the PH podcasts. It was almost like Antonia and Joel were analyzing me. Like, I could “hear” them talking about me and how the podcast information applied to me. LOL That probably sounds totally weird, but like I said, it put me into this flow state for about 4 hours, and I was on top of the world afterward. Hope this helps.
Awesome and useful information. While no insomnia for this INTJ, likely because I protect my mornings, I now clearly see that a dirty-hurt 10 year old resides within. When necessary, the car model helps me move out of that position by visualizing myself moving from that crumb infested child seat into the more adult can-see-where-I’m-headed passenger seat. It feels like moving through molasses and probably only takes 20-30 seconds but once accomplished, I feel more calmly effective back in my Te mode. Bike riding, walking or working out for just 15-30 minutes several times per week helps keep balance too. Love these podcasts!
This podcast really got me thinking. I’ve always thought of cognitive functions as a unit that forces a type to act a certain way. For example in an INTP: Ti makes them come up with systems, Ne makes them brainstorm and expand or connect systems, Si makes them stationary (to accomplish/work out complex thoughts), then Fe eventually communicates it to everyone. I’ve never really thought of them as separate entities to be individually worked on it’s an interesting perspective.
When you guys said in the podcast that Ti and Fi is draining for you, do you think that ENTPs and ENFPs have more in common with each other than with intp/infp their introverted type (since the introverts are pros at Ti and Fi). Ive heard that NTPs, NFPs, NTJs ect. are basically the same type because they share the first two functions. But in this podcast it seems that the types that share the dominant function is closer in relashion; like ENTJs would be closer to ESTJ than INTJ because Te is really developed while Ni isn’t (unless really worked on).
-sorry if the wording is confusing, it was difficult to write my thoughts out clearly.