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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about the power of making decisions using the system of your own unique personality type.
In this podcast you’ll find:
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How does the system of our Myers-Briggs® personality type work together to help us make our decisions?
- Can knowing our type help us make better decisions? The power of models, maps and tools
- Example – an ENTJ and a box of cookies
- What does a systems thinking approach to decision making look like?
- Why decision making is difficult in a post-modern world.
- How an ENTJ and an INTP can use their cognitive functions to decide whether or not to buy the box of cookies.
- Understanding your backseat functions – what to do if the decision is coming from your 10 Year Old or 3 Year Old function.
- Coaching others to help them make better decisions for themselves
- What are the two different roles the Perceiving and the Judging functions play in decision making?
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Why is it harder for Perceivers to make decisions?
- How introverted and extraverted judging functions differ in coming to decisive action.
- The importance of “experiencing” as a Perceiver
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How can understanding the nature of our functions help with decision making?:
- Memory (Si) and Perspectives (Ni) – how their infinite nature can trick us
- Accuracy (Ti) and Authenticity (Fi) – why they can never come to a satisfying conclusion
- Exploration (Ne) and Sensation (Se) – why do they need to explore?
- Harmony (Fe) and Effectiveness (Te) – the downside of making quick decisions
- Activity – use the Car Model to answer question: “should I buy a pack of cookies?”
- Each function has a different relationship with consuming cookies.
- Self awareness when it comes to your back-seat functions and making decisions.
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17 comments
Hi Antonia,
You said your Ti wanted to know the answer to the universe?
I already got that one. It’s 42. I am still pondering on the question though.
But seriously. It is a nice episode. It made me think twice on wether or not i wanted to post this remark because it feels like it’s coming from my Fe tertiary that is looking for aknowledgement and connection while my Ti is telling me this comment has no added value apart from the comedy (ENTP Pref.)
I guess the explanation makes the comment sort of usedull again ;)
I’m an ENFJ and the things that I think about first on whether I should get cookies or not are, will I be able to enjoy these cookies with someone I love or am fond of? Or who else can I buy those cookies for if I’m already going out of the way to get those cookies? I’m more likely to get the cookies if there was an opportunity to share it or gift it to someone who would enjoy it, than if I were to eat it alone.
I have INTJ preferences.
How I normally would decide whether to buy a pack of cookies:
-Fi: Cookies are my favorite food. I want some. Life is hard.
-Te: Do I have the money?
-Se: Cookies are so delicious! I never remember exactly how they taste, so will you please indulge me?
-Ni: What’s the point of the cookies anyway?
-Fi/Se: I want them.
-Te: (sighs) Well, I have the money, but I am not spending it on these cookies. The quantity is too large.
-Se (and maybe Si): The cookies in the bakery section are higher quality.
-Te: And some come in acceptably small packages.
-Ni: Well, I cannot see many ways that buying the cookies will ruin anything of importance.
-Fi: You’re the best!
-Se: I like food!
-Ni: I will regret this, but I would end up regretting this more if I buy the stale cookies. Fine.
So I buy the cookies.
How the decision probably should end up being made (realistic example that could happen in my own life):
-Fi: Life is hard.
-Se: Cookies are yummy. I cannot recall their exact taste, but…
-Fi: I like cookies. Cookies will make me feel better.
-Te: No. Solving the problem will.
-Ni: It has been 3 days since the last meaningful conversation with another human. Is that the problem?
-Fi: Yes!
-Te (and maybe Ni): I know just the trick. Go out of your way to talk to people about interesting stuff. Emotions affect productivity.
-Te/Si: It’s worked before!
-Ni: There are so many awesome side benefits to socializing, too. Not just solving loneliness.
-Si (and maybe Fi): With people I actually know.
-Se: I want to see those people! Also, thinking of cookies makes me hungry.
-Fi: I still want cookies, too…
-Ni/Te: I can bring the cookies to the friends. After buying them. We can share, and all of us get cookies.
-Fi/Se: Yay!
-Si: Comfort food…
-Se: They need to be good cookies, especially since I will be eating them. I like food. Making food is fun. Think of the cookie batter I can snack on!
-Ni/Te: Change of plans. I have all the ingredients at home, and since making cookies is both cheaper and produces better results than store bought cookies, I will make cookies and then bring them to the friends to share. I do have time in my schedule for this.
-Fi/Se: Great idea.
-Si: Better comfort food…
So, I do not buy the cookies.
Hi everyone. I’ve been thinking for a long time about how to say this.
There’s something in this episode that was triggering to me. It’s all these ideas that were implies:
1/ You can’t trust your body to eat cookies whenever you want
2/ Eating a lot of cookies makes you fat
3/ Fat is unhealthy
4/ Unhealthy is bad
I’m going to challenge them one by one:
1/ You can’t trust your body to eat cookies whenever you want
In my experience, if you try to overrun your cravings by denying them, you end up binge eating. It is not with control but with trust that you can manage to build a healthy relationship with your body. What I’ve found is when I give myself unconditional permission to eat anything, I crave cookies sometimes, but not all the time.
2/ Eating a lot of cookies makes you fat
It could, if you eat mindlessly without listening to your body. But there are a lot of other factors that can contribute to body weight / fat that are outside of our control:
- Genetics
- Sleep
- Dieting (95% of diets to lose weight fail by 5 years’ time and actually result in weight gain)
- Stress (like the stress experienced by fat people when they are subject to violence or discrimination).
3/ Fat is unhealthy
That’s difficult to prove. There are healthy and unhealthy people at all weights and sizes. And weight is very often unrelated to health.
Here’s a scientific article if you wish to inquire further:
https://nutritionj.biomedcentral.com/articles/10.1186/1475-2891-10-9
4/ Unhealthy is bad
Actually, the same as weight and fat, health is for a large part outside of our control (it depends on genetics, what our mother ate when she was pregnant, upbringing, socioeconomic status, stress, etc.). If someone has a chronic illness, we can’t blame it on them. It’s shitty, but sometimes our bodies can’t do what we want them to do.
But that doesn’t make us any less worthy. Because our worth is not determined by what we look like, or how productive we are. We have the right to exist no matter what.
Anyway. Antonia, perhaps you didn’t mean all that. I just wanted to make sure everyone is safe. These things called “diet culture” and “fatphobia” have caused a lot of harm in my life, and I don’t wish it to anyone to spiral into the self-hatred and the disordered behaviours that I’ve been through.
Myself in cookie scenario (INTP);
Damn, look at all these options. We are so fortunate to have grocery stores with a vast array of items… although it can be distracting. Everytime my focus is shifted it consumes cognitive energy, but lets see kind feelin this one over jingle :: looks at phone wondering why ringer is on ::
[Text]
Kimberly: Hey, do you want hangout tonight?
:: quickly composes timed text for 50 minutes from current time ::
Me: Kimberly, hope you’re having a good day. Have to work tonight. Also, I have my daughter tomorrow. Enjoy your evening :)
Okay, lets see, wtf are these. Never seen this brand. Coconut etc etc. Sounds good. Nice mission statement too. Man, I dont want to lead this girl on but dont want to be an asshole. We have nothing in common. Which is surprising bc other enfp girls in the past. Did I miss type her. [2.5 seconds pass] hah no. Someone should make a dating app for archeologist and call it carbon dating. Okay cookies right, um, well this new brand doesn’t stimulate the visual cortex as well as others. Which seems more pure. Almost as though they have good intentions and are less concerned about squeezing every penny out of people with advanced market psychology. The second paragraph of the mission statement could use a better transition word. Shit, I could write a better mission statement altogether. Maybe I should try to work in product development. What else do we got here. Oh these, nah peanutbutter seems to create a minor inflammatory response in my temple here. This seems like a lot of cookies. :: heads to other part of store where they sell individual cookies :: Kim’s dad probably owns this store. Unless she won the lottery or something. Nope. Wait what if her dad owns this store and she’s on the phone with the security officer. Bahahaha what an intp thing to think for a flash second. Damn I wonder how many intp’s lose their shit to conspiracy theories. ::sigh:: NF hmm P There has to a significantly higher distribution of NF ppl in this town. Precievers as well. INFP’s love nature like all introverts and the overall lifestyle is more natural which is a magnet for authenticity. The ENFPs love the variety and.. Okay if i buy one cookie the bacteria I am slowly attempting to eradicate is just going to send another sugar signal later. However, if i buy a box the gut brain axis isnt going to mitigate signal. Its not like it has a built in buffer system. A built in buffering system eh.. is that solvable? Probably just another stupid idea. Ill just buy some bananas and a few apples. :: goes to checkout ::
This checkout dude’s expression just screams INFJ feel bad for that guy. Okay how bout this line over here. Whoa who is this goddess? She has the INFP look. [Short bs how are you today conversation ensues] No bag please. She smiles. Hey is your mbti INFP? ‘yeah actually it is how did you know that?’ Idk lucky guess. ’what’s yours’ (holy shit she actually asked a question in response. Did i mistype. No. Was there a paradigm shift where ppl..)
The one everyone hates. Hope you have a good one. :: walks to car :: Okay how to respond to Kim’s inevitable cascade of stage 5 cling texts. What would an ENTJ do? Lol probably send her a link to 2 chainz where you been. Or tell her shes fired even though she was never hired then block her or just toss this expensive phone in a dumpster and go buy a new one. He def wouldn’t type all this shit out but he might impulsively post it without reading..as i would. Hmm little shadow integration.