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PHQ | QUESTIONS FROM COMMUNITY: In this episode Joel and Antonia answer a question about cognitive function exercises that can help you figure out your personality type.
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PHQ | QUESTIONS: ENFJ vs INFJ
PHQ | QUESTIONS: Introverted Feeling vs Introverted Thinking
17 comments
Thanks for the comment, Sara! I really enjoyed your insights into how the Fi mind works. I never realized how meta Fi can get. That would explain why Fi is so hard to pin down in personality typology and why they sometimes have a hard time imagining people fitting so handily into a 4 letter code. Fascinating!
Just popping in to say, I’m glad you’ve pretty much found your type, GM and I hope by now you’ve found closure on your identity. Reading your conversation here reminds me of my own journey to find my type and while I was decently sure I am an intuitive, probably an intuitive feeler, there has been a few mad evenings when I begin to seriously consider myself as an ESFP. It took myself two years of a lot of digging through the Jungian functions to come to the conclusion that I am an ENFP (despite all the tests always type me as INFP even now).
And I must say, I completely resonate with this: "If someone were to say, “try to get everyone’s needs met”, I know I would ask, “Well, how am I supposed to do that?” "
Back in my early teens when my mother was preparing me for the scary adult life, she talked about things I should do as an eldest child, getting everyone’s needs met was one of them (she is an ESFJ) and I remember thinking “should I be getting everyone’s needs met or everyone’s wants met?”. This usually ends up with me looking at her with glazed eyes as my mind dives into the concept of needs and wants and my dear mother gripped me hard and say “I know you’re thinking that adults don’t understand youths but we have more experience than you do and you should give us credence to it.” which is probably a wrong move as I immediately thought “Do adults even understand adults? Does one ever even has the mental capacity to understand themselves?” and so on.
I too had quite a hard time in the beginning with type verification. In the end I had to let go of the behaviors and dive into the functions. Before, I was typing what I wanted to be, not really who I am; the functions that I desired to be better at. I believe that came from my carrer and my carrer mentor who is an ENTJ. In a way I was afraid of judging what I would find to be unworthy.
Now I feel confident, even though when I read certain descriptions I find some of the “behaviors” to be things that go against personal values. But it’s because I weigh these descriptions first that I’m pointed towards IxFx. Once I kinda settled on Fi (Authenticity) I looked to see if Te (Effectiveness) was something that both I really wanted to do well and, if I’m being true to myself, stink at. Turns out that was a BIG YES! So in a way I typed myself based on my inferior 3yr old because it was so easy to see.
Next I learned the difference between Si/Ne and Se/Ni and started to try to relate. I am overwhelmingly a kinesthetic learner; I simply have to do it if I want to learn it. I do pattern recognize and have many moments that are “ah ha” moments, but they are sparse and not all like my wife (INTJ) who seems to know what’s going to happen in any moment a week beforehand.
While we all remember the past, I rarely use it to make a decision and I don’t explore the possibilities from reality in front of me, but yet enjoying living and experiencing the moment. So this leads me toward Se(Sensation)/Ni(Perspectives) and away from Si(Memory)/Ne(Exploration).
To be fair, I also examined Fe/Ti. While I can understand Fe, the more I dove into it and was honest with myself, the more I realized that emotions and feeling we’re coming from inside of me, not from others around me. Ti is like an alien planet – I can make sense of it and I do like for things to be “accurate” but my world is much more of a warm subjective place than the frozen tundra that I see in introverted thinking.
So, after all that, BOOM, I’m an ISFP. An ISFP that finished college in four years who only had 11 others in his class graduate on time with him. An ISFP that is outspoken and willing to share his opinions with anyone who wants to talk about them. An ISFP who lives in a world of other artists, and even though is a musician and performs, doesn’t view himself through the artist’s lens, but rather a teacher. And through teaching others music and how better to express themselves within an ensemble and pushing themselves to be better musicians and members, finds the core of what he feels to be his art.
Don’t worry about the box. Be yourself and you will find who you are. I wish you the best success!
Thanks for the comment Sri! I just bought Gladwell’s Blink because you are the second person to bring it up today. I loved Outliers! So thanks for the reference. :)
One of the keys to really discovering who you are is to explore the copilot (auxiliary) function and see how it makes you feel. If you are an INFJ, you will feel profound gratitude and happiness when you can accurately meet the needs of others and you love connecting with other people on a spiritual level. INFJs find offending others more distressing than offending themselves.
If you are an INTJ, you will feel awesome when you get things accomplished, check things off the to-do list, and create systems that function effectively. You have an ability to place people in the rolls that best fit their strengths and don’t have a hard time making the tough calls when data and metrics clearly trump the human element.
Which one of those sounds most like you?
I’ve been MBTI-ed repeatedly over the years often by the coroprations by which I was employed. Test results have teeter-tottered between INTJ and INFJ, but the past three or four passes have come up INFJ, so I think I’ll stick with that. Dominant: Introverted IntuitionAuxilliary: Extraverted FeelingTertiary: Introverted ThinkingInferior: Extraverted SensingKinda pointless to argue the validity of the analysis for the most part, it describes me rather well I am systematic and intuitive. I do define and refine my priorities, but operate on an intuitive basis that is entirely spontaneous Suselogic.Dunno how uncanny my insight into people and situations is situational analysis is as much a skill as an art or a gift , and if one perceives without prejudice, the moment (or person) will very often reveal itself. I have learned to trust my instincts I don’t believe in a 6th sense, but if I let the standard 5 do their bits, I’m usually good. To borrow from Malcolm Gladwell, I blink . A lot.