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In this episode, Joel and Antonia dive deep into the unique challenges, needs, and desires of the INTJ personality type.

In this podcast on the INTJ personality type you’ll find:


INTJ Survey

Cassandra – Greek Mythology – Gift of Prophecy without believers.

Ability to see what’s coming down the line, but nobody cares.

Foresight is different from prophecy.

Prophecy knows what’s coming up. Foresight can predict based on observation.

Strategy: Where’s the puck going?

Cynicism comes along with an INTJ recognizing that the world doesn’t value their gifts.

Isolation, loneliness, misunderstood, separation.

Mastermind Article“Smartest people in the room based upon analytical and linguistic intelligence.”

We as a society have decided different criteria for intelligence. Not necessarily right. There are multiple styles of intelligence. Other types outclass INTJs regarding different kinds of intelligence (i.e. kinesthetic, emotional, etc.)

INTJs are very careful thinkers. They spend a lot of time thinking about whatever has captured their interest. Because they’re careful about how they think, they are also very careful about how they articulate their thoughts. They will show up as smarter because they express their words more precisely. They encourage everyone else to be more careful with how we think.

They expend Energetic credits in thinking through things, which is why INTJs have such an Economy of motion.

Many INTJs think the vast majority of people are careless thinkers.

Cognitive Functions

Car Model

The driver process for INTJs is Introverted Intuition that we nicknamed “Perspectives.”

Driver – Ni

Perspectives is the ability to watch your mind form patterns over a long time.

Podcast Introverted Intuition vs Extraverted Intuition

INTJs are inside their mind all the time.

They have a sixth sense of what is coming down the pike.

Perspectives is not right 100% of the time. It is a skill that must be developed. Predictions become more accurate the more you develop the skill.

INTJs love conceptualizing what is happening next.

People who use Perspectives think about the box. It’s about meaning and meta perspectiving.

Perspective users start to realize the subjective nature of how people see the world.

The copilot process for INTJs is Extraverted Thinking that we nicknamed “Effectiveness.”

Effectiveness asks “what works?” What is the bottom line? What will accomplish the objective?

Effectiveness is linear. A step by step approach to how to get things done.

Metrics. How do we measure whether something is pass-fail?

Effectiveness Can appear cold hearted because of its way of navigating around feelings to get a project accomplished.

Break things down to component levels. Uses Humans as resources. Effectiveness is Best when emotions aren’t clouding it.

Ni + Te = Perspectives loves to predict. Effectiveness is about metrics and implementing strategies. Coupled together, these create sustainable systems.

INTJs systems are context dependent. They want to make sure no one comes along and breaks their systems.

The 10-year-old process is Introverted Feeling that we have nicknamed Authenticity.

Tertiary – Fi

Authenticity is a decision-making process that checks in with inner alignment.

How are things impacting you emotionally?

Done well it can replicate someone else’s emotions and mirror those feelings back

As a 10-year-old it isn’t a strength. It becomes solely about how things are impacting the INTJ.

It makes the average INTJ feel like a sitting duck; A childlike part of them that can be hurt.

It’s not just a recognition about how things impact you, but it’s an internalization which becomes more crippling.

INTJs struggle because they have a tendency to over rely on this process.

Driver process is Introverted – Copilot is extraverted: we need to have access to both worlds. Introverts need real world feedback to stay balanced.

Ten year old is introverted. Introverts can find themselves avoiding the outer world and staying within. So they rest on that Ni – Fi loop.

If you get inside somebody else’s perspective, then mirror their emotions it becomes overwhelming to a Thinker. So they shut themselves off and create massive distance from the world.

Why INTJs feel so lonely. Human relationships require a measure of vulnerability.

The solution is that INTJs need to become vulnerable. They will survive. They are resilient.

Pain may seem neverending, but it does fade. People can massively add to the quality of your life.

To get to vulnerability, INTJs need to use their Copilot first. Create systems and frameworks of connecting with others.

Create a social event you can feel some control over. As the host, you are the highest status person in the room, and you know everyone.

When INTJs feel out of control, they clamp down.

When Effectiveness feels good in general, it is more open to experiencing closer relationships.

If INTJs aren’t implementing enough effectiveness strategies, they’re going to feel vulnerable and out of control.

Get out of comfort zone and get into action.

Swap the feeling of vulnerability with empowerment. Empowerment comes from building things in outside world and knowing you got the world handled. Then the vulnerability fades.

Even when Authenticity is used well, and it is healthy it is very idealistic. It’s not so much about reality but conviction. This is how things should be making me feel.

Perfectionism is a running theme for INTJs because it is an idealism of the way things should be.

Idealism gets turned in on INTJ themselves, which is crippling.

The opposite is Effectiveness which is pass/fail criteria. Good is better than perfect.

Authenticity is about “does it feel good to me?” So to INTJs nothing is ever good enough. They are waiting for just the right time. Just that perfect moment to implement the ideal strategy.

INTJs should never wait for that perfect moment to act. Start acting first.

Let Authenticity serve Effectiveness.

Effectiveness forces you out of your shell. But there are so many problems when INTJs use Fi as their navigator.

The 3-year-old process is Extraverted Sensing we have nicknamed “Sensation.”

Inferior – Se

Real-time kinetic connection with the environment. Blind spot to INTJs. Sensation Usually shows up when they are Overly stressed. Causes them to Overindulge in sensory behavior.

Both back seat passengers are incredibly indulgent for INTJs: Fi is emotional indulgence, and Se is sensory indulgence.

The thing that they have to monitor themselves for is whether or not they are going to an indulgent space. INTJs need to be physically aware of their body’s needs. The body is not just a vehicle for the brain.

There are Neurons in the stomach and heart which means that the brain cells extend into our body.

A good relationship with three-year-old means you’re nourishing your body and not feeding it junk food.

INTJ women feel disconnected from other women and intimidating to men.

Thinker Women and Feeler Men podcast

25% of women are Thinkers.

When you don’t fit the ideal imprint of the average female you are not going to attract the highest percentage of people, but there are people out there that are looking for a bird of paradise just like you.

If you haven’t run into these people yet, it is because you’re not in the right place. Go beyond your comfort zone.

INTJs don’t have a lot of patience for themselves. One of the best ways to make space for others and be more patient with others is by being more patient with yourself.

Stop worrying about how you should be and be willing to fail and learn. Be the person who gets things done as opposed to conceptualizing things.

Push through the challenges. There will be waste, but action is better than non-action.

Feedback from the outside world will make you feel stronger and more empowered.

In this episode, Joel and Antonia dive deep into the unique challenges, needs, and desires of the INTJ personality type. #MBTI #INTJ

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  • Randy Caba
    • Randy Caba
    • October 23, 2015 at 5:37 pm

    And thanks for the thanks, George. We INTJs are few and far between so, a high-five now and then has real meaning.

  • Nino
    • Nino
    • October 23, 2015 at 5:13 pm

    Hi Joel and Antonia,

    I’ve been listening to your podcast for awhile now and I love it! Your description of it being my intuitive fix during my morning commute is a very accurate description of what I feel when I listen to them. I listened to this podcast especially today and I was surprised when I could relate to it quite precisely. Especially about the being in Think Thank type careers.

    Now, my confusion begins when I start to wonder why it relates to me. I have known that I have been a male INFJ for some time who’s in the scientific field, although I’m beginning to pursue more of my artistic side by switching careers and going to an art school. But I was wondering if its because I’ve surrounded myself with people who’s job is to think in the same manner that is similar to an INTJ.

    I am pretty confident that I am not mis-typed since I feel so deeply and have done an extensive research on INFJ personality(ranging from forums to your podcast/website) I empathize with people a lot. I love coming up with solutions and listening to people’s problem and counseling them.

    I was just wondering, could it be a combination of me being male(what the world expects me to act), being in the sciences where analytical thinking is required and an INFJ’s chameleon like quality can make me or other INFJ’s come off in the world as being more of a thinker? I have noticed that I would end up taking on people’s thought process and using them as my own. For example my friend is an INTJ and I would talk to her for a long time about my concerns and what I was feeling at the moment and she would give me a systematic feedback. Eventually when we are away I would end up talking to her in my head as a way of reasoning out with myself certain scenarios that I would otherwise feel too emotionally charged to handle. I felt as though I was absorbing her thought process. But this is just one example as I am also surrounded by professors who have been my mentor and I wanted to know if you two also think that this is plausible or could be what is happening.

    I just wanted to say, thank you so much for the podcasts. I can take a lot of the concepts and relate them so much to different topics and that’s something I get excited about.

  • Shawn
    • Shawn
    • October 23, 2015 at 5:12 pm

    Relationships are not very predictable (driver seat) and horribly inefficient (passenger seat), at least from an INTJ’s point of view. It should be no wonder we INTJs may run into trouble in this area. When we throw caution to the wind, strap on idealism and then let the 10-year old have some say in the direction the vehicle is going with regard to relationships, it can feel a little too paint-by-numbers – and the last thing an INTJ “Houlden Caulfield” type of personality wants to do is be “phony.”

    After a few fender-benders, the INTJ may give up entirely until the next overwhelmingly seductive Authenticity challenge comes along. And there he goes again, throwing himself into passions he’s ill equipped to sustain.

    Undoubtedly this is a problem I have struggled with.

    When an INTJ can’t predict or guarantee the results of an endeavor, he may not find it worth pursuing after the first couple of tries. This isn’t just a “vulnerability avoidance” issue, though that certainly factors in. I can’t speak for others, but I’m more afraid of the potential to have spent entirely too much personal capital (time, energy) on something unpredictable and inefficient only to have it die on me because I failed to find the pattern in time. An INTJ finds it hard to admit and face up to failure in anything.

    I think Randy is right – dogs seem the perfect companions for INTJs because they are attentive, efficient, and operate holistically on patterns we easily identify with. Cats are unpredictable; dogs are reliable and have lighter expectations.

    People just don’t seem as reliable overall, so we may have a harder time bonding with them.


  • Julie
    • Julie
    • October 23, 2015 at 5:11 pm

    Thanks for the great advice on especially Fi! Focusing on the Te when feeling like a sitting duck and being stuck sounds like a very good idea. I can see that I am in a place right now where that advice should be implemented much more than I already do and in all aspects of my life in order to move on and develop into a better version of myself. In general as an INTJ female I find your INTJ descriptions the most accurate I have come across. So thank you for that, too.

  • ryan
    • ryan
    • October 23, 2015 at 2:55 pm

    I’m so pleased that you mentioned Gardner.

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