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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about the difference between mistakes and blind spots.

 

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Showing 6 comments
  • Ash V.O.
    Reply

    I like the pattern you kind of talked around, re: connecting more/feeling more personally responsible for the aspects of your blindspot that are colored by your 10yo process. It’s almost like when one of my older daughters tries to convince a younger one it’s safe to jump out of a tree (because it seems doable and fun to the older one!)

    Seems like my 10yo Fe says, “Hey, we’re okay at creating a really great environment for everyone; let’s do a full-on traditional holiday like Si-grandma used to!” And I’ll be cussing and scrambling and up at 2am trying to coordinate 10 dishes at a time in my usual casual Ne-style, I’ve forgotten stockings or something, and basically the Grinch (the opposite of what I’d envisioned in my head).

    But, like, getting the oil changed regularly or submitting school records (on time or at all?) Meh. Unless there’s some human element pinging my “this will cause relational strife” radar, I’ve absolutely let it lapse, especially before I started opting in on text reminders.

    The distinction between strong suit mistakes/learning opportunities and blind spots is a swift kick in the pants. Thanks.

  • Heather
    Reply

    I loved listening to this podcast, it unraveled new perspectives for me to analyze my blind spots. I’m an INFP personality type and MAN have I had some struggles coming to grips with my weak areas. I’m a mother of four children and, as an INFP, constantly struggle with keeping a clean house and I battle it out with my organization skills. We INFPs seem to struggle with that. I used to tie my identity as a mother to the idea of a pristine house where everything is in order, meals are cooked on time, and every child gets their homework done, chores done, etc. My mother, as an ISFJ was very much the picture perfect mother in these areas. I was constantly getting feedback from her that I needed to be cleanly, organized, and well…Just like her.

    It has been a monumental battle between me and these blind spots. I’m 35 now and it’s been over a decade of struggle to try and live my life according to my ISFJ mother’s expectations and my own expectations. It’s been a step by step process, but I’ve finally realized that I was holding unrealistic expectations to myself especially as I came to learn more about myself as an INFP. My strengths will never be in the areas of order or organization. I do believe that we can get better at these blind spots, I am MUCH more organized and my house is pretty darn clean most of the time for an INFP, but some important points were brought up in the podcast–instead of draining so much effort, time, and anxious thoughts over what we are not good at, focus instead on those areas of strengths that we possess. I loved hearing that part in the podcast.

    I think it’s important to try and better our weak areas, even while realizing we will never be excellent in those areas. As a mother, I need to constantly work at these weaknesses in order for life to run more smoothly and to cut down on the chaos. Now I just don’t have to tie my identity to those blind spots. This podcast is a good reminder to shift our focus to our strengths and really analyze what’s holding us back from diving into our potential instead of distracting ourselves with things better left to others.

  • Leah
    Reply

    Thanks A and J for a great few end of year podcasts!
    What do you guys define as a blind spot?
    I think of them as areas of things we don’t know that we don’t; blind to it. No or little insight to a part of ourselves.
    Is your definition more about skills that we aren’t so good at and probably won’t get better at.
    Totally with you on forms and government papers…stress me out completely that it’s comical. My reason is it’s soooo ridiculous!

    • Leah
      Reply

      PS. INFJ here

  • Laurel Yau
    Reply

    I really appreciate that you outlined these two ideas, since I think it is something I have been unconsciously grappling with for a long time. I’ve always been typed as an ENTP, and I’ve had a hard time coming into my own and really seeing how I could be my type. Especially since I’ve always been more drawn to Effectiveness and Authenticity primaries, and my Dad had a very strong INTJ personality. It seems like frequently I’ve been dismissed because my own intuitive process is too messy and unrefined; and questioned my type frequently when seeing how others excel at executing their ideas. In the moment that has left me in a place of feeling anxious and disconnected with others, because it seems like I bring nothing to the table.

    The idea that maybe this has been just a series of highly painful mistakes, and that despite feeling inadequate I should trust my own Ti is inspiring. I know that I am terrible at maintaining timelines, and keeping up with all the little details, but at the moment I don’t have any other way to pick up the slack than just to get in there and do it myself. So I guess my question to you is when your blindspots are critical for success, how do you make it through?

    • Antonia Dodge
      Reply

      “So I guess my question to you is when your blindspots are critical for success, how do you make it through?”

      Delegate them to others. It’s why true success can’t be accomplished alone.

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