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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about how to manage your energy levels when doing intense identity level personal transformation work.
In this podcast you’ll find:
- Personal growth is about metamorphosis and transition.
- Metamorphosis takes a lot of time and energy.
- Betsy Garmon Journaling Technique
- Personal Development can look so designer, but it is hard work.
- Identity level growth burns way more energy than standard everyday growth.
- Some deeper growth may pull you away from your life for a time.
- Identity level growth challenges who you are.
- Once the caterpillar enters the cocoon and starts changing, it can’t stop the process.
- You have to be willing to follow through no matter the results.
- Rewards can be murky. Results can be painful.
- You aren’t changing who you are. You are finding who you were.
- You are finding the original new, not a new you.
- The original you may have never wanted the choices your ego made.
- It can be expensive.
- “If it were easy, everyone would be doing it.”
- Be honest about why you are starting a personal growth journey.
- Practical ideas for growth work:
- 1-Get clear on what it is you want to transform.
- You don’t always have a clear picture of what the other side is going to look like.
- Don’t get too specific about the results.
- Questions are more important than answers.
- 2-Set expectations and boundaries for yourself or others that may be impacted by the work.
- Don’t be too specific about what you won’t be doing. You have no idea how things will turn out.
- Give yourself enough space to explore what needs to be explored.
- 3-Timelines: schedule regular time to do transformational work.
- Be proactive. Schedule a retreat or seminar.
- Get a friend to hold you accountable.
- First schedule your R&R. Increase the quality of your rest.
- High-quality alone time.
- Take care of yourself physically with enough rest and nutritious food.
- Create a touchpoint to record your personal growth experience.
- Journal
- Ask people you trust for feedback.
- There needs to be an integration process.
- A rest period to allow your identity to recover.
- Ask yourself: “What does this mean?”
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12 comments
Edit: I should say we successfully identified the wall. I now have some work to do :-)
I loved the abstractions! It’s not often you hear homeschooling, diablo and portal mentioned within the span of five minutes! That made me giggle.
And I loved you guys sharing a bit of your struggles. I’m also doing some personal work- it’s probably not as intense as yours- but growth nevertheless and you’re right, it is hard. Joel your point about finding your “question” really helped me. I worked on that the next day and going in a couple of levels revealed this huge wall from my childhood that I had no idea was there. Hubby and I worked it out that night and we broke through! But it wouldn’t have happened without your suggestion, thank you!
Fun to do with the kiddos: https://www.google.com/search?biw=1366&bih=603&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=W1zjWvODBISb5wLCxaWoDw&q=portal+companion+cube+origami&oq=portal+companion+cube+origami&gs_l=psy-ab.3…0.0.0.95739.0.0.0.0.0.0.0.0..0.0….0…1c..64.psy-ab..0.0.0….0.SbeG_4SxVEs
Hi Joel & Antonia
Thank you so much for this podcast !!!
It so presented at the exact right moment in my life.
I am in the middle of a huge identity transformation and I have been so tired !
You guys just confirmed my intuition that this was due to the emotional impact of these transformations so I can be reassured and continu my journey confident and full of curiosity of what the outcome may be.
I used the butterfly metaphore just the other day to explain what I was going through to several friends. And Antonia, please do not change the way you podcast, and Joel neither, I so love the way you talk abstractly !
Hi Joel & Antonia! I love love loved this podcast! Having gone through a divorce about 3.5 years ago, I have done a ton of personal growth work and it is extremely exhausting. I appreciated the guidance for how to approach this work and I think I can actually use that so I can complete some of what I started a couple years ago. I’ve been floating around for a bit and I’m getting pretty tired of that. When Antonia went into describing the terrain and process that you guys have used to explore each of yourselves I was able to visualize it completely and it made total sense. You were completely speaking my language which honestly doesn’t happen very often for me (with people in my life) so I got super excited and into it (I’m an INFJ by the way). Also, just a little positive feedback for Joel; the use of the word metamorphizing was completely accurate and I appreciated it very much!
Hey! Thank you both for sharing your thoughts on this topic!
Right now I’m nearing the tailend of an intense identity personality growth period. And, I wanted to mention and remind everyone that the energy consumption will get easier and easier to manage the further you go down your personal growth journey! Also, the better you manage your time, the less harsh your personal growth process will become!
Keep your head up, manage your time wisely, and never stop growing. That is a recipe for nearly seamless growth and a happier life!
-Lucky Wright, ENFP