Download Episode Hereright click link and select “Save Link As…”

In this episode, Joel and Antonia draw out personal lessons they learned by putting together the Empowered: INFPs and INFJs.

In this podcast you’ll find:

  • Empowered: INFPs and INFJs
  • Interview series – 6 high performing INs
  • Top 10 challenges INFs report:
    • Finding purpose
    • Establishing boundaries
    • Overcoming indecision
    • Feeling judged
    • Simultaneously desiring and fearing intimacy
    • Time management
    • Lacking assertiveness
    • Lacking motivation
    • Anxiety
    • Making money
  • Core emotion to all interviews was anger
  • Anger tied to permission
  • “Anger helped me give myself permission to create the boundaries to confront the people, set up the circumstances, achieve the goals, etc.”
  • Sadness often under-pins the anger.
  • But sadness isn’t as motivating as anger.
  • Anger is the catalyst
  • Anger can help us defend ourselves.
  • “Anger is just energy. Once you recognize that, you can use it to put you on your path.”
  • All emotions serve us in some capacity.
  • Understand why it’s there, what it needs, and how you can use it.
  • “Forgiveness is a process that begins with anger.”
  • Anger is how you can find yourself on the map.
  • Anger is closer to a tool than a weapon.
  • It has some legitimate applications.
  • Anger is the one time when some people shut off the perpetual deference to other’s interests and start expressing their own.
  • Nobody should stay in anger. It is a tool for a short time.
  • Each council member found patience and forgiveness for themselves.
  • When it comes to spiritual/soul hygiene, there is one thing that never changes: eat your vegetables.
  • Vegetables: Presence work. Mindfulness.
  • Don’t let the world rush you. Be patient. Trust yourself.
  • Be present with you.
  • Forgive yourself for your mistakes.
  • Presence gives you the ability to let go of energy-hogging experiences like self-criticism and perfectionism.
  • Dharma: Purpose
  • Presence cuts you slack in some ways and not at all in other ways if it applies to your purpose.
  • You don’t roll over and give up.
  • The voice inside that beats you up when you aren’t doing what you’re supposed to.
  • Self-discipline vs. self-criticism
  • Annie Lalla talks about creating a life that will attract the love of your life.
  • It’s premature to have love until you have self-love.
  • “Never make the past wrong.”
  • Stop beating yourself up for past sins.
  • Find joy in the little things.
  • See these things as expressions of love from strangers.
  • Every time someone does something for you, see it as a loving expression
  • Focus on the positive things.
  • Don’t focus on the negative things that happen to you.
  • Even arguing with your loved one can be an expression of love if it is for the benefit of the relationship.
  • Amplify the small beautiful things.
  • Fall in love with your life!
  • Who am I to be living this amazing life? I must be a fantastic person!
  • If you love life and love yourself you will become magnetic to others with the same vibration.
  • Magnify the mundane.
  • Betsy Garmon (INFJ) “Self-care is about self-knowledge.”
  • Know yourself and become intimate with your boundaries and needs.
  • Boundary setting is self-care.
  • Daniel Karan: Self-care is about the emergent.
  • If Daniel has something he doesn’t want to do, he knows when he has done proper self-care because he has the resources to do it anyway.
  • Plenty of sleep, nutrient-dense foods, getting to the gym, getting plenty of expressions of his love language, massage, etc.
  • Introspection. Understanding the things you need.
  • Give yourself quarter by preparing for the world and caring for your needs.
  • What have I been ignoring in my life? Sleep? Water? Exercise?
  • INFs have redefined self-care for themselves.
  • Daniel Karan talked about the importance of trusting yourself.
  • “Why would we not trust ourselves?
  • We use the same criteria to trust ourselves as we do a friend or family member.
  • How long would you trust someone who lies or isn’t reliable?
  • We promise ourselves all sorts of things , then we don’t come through. “I’m going to get in shape.”
  • “I’m going to eat better.”
  • “I’m going to spend more time with someone.”
  • We disappoint ourselves, so we don’t trust ourselves.
  • If you are feeling a lack of trust for yourself, what minuscule things are you doing to undermine that trust?
  • It’s about your relationship with yourself.
  • If you find a high performer, ask them a few questions about the things they’ve learned in their life.
  • Not everybody’s journey is one of insight and paradigm shifts, so make sure they’re high performers.
  • Become the best version of yourself.
  • What have you learned from people who are a different type?
  • Empowered: INFPs and INFJs

In this episode Joel and Antonia draw out personal lessons they learned by putting together the INFx Empowered program for INFPs and INFJs. #INFJ #INFP

To subscribe to the podcast, please use the links below:

Subscribe with iTunes
Non-iTunes Link
Google Play
Radio Public
Listen Notes

If you like the podcast and want to help us out in return, please leave an honest rating and review on iTunes by clicking here. It will help the show and its ranking in iTunes immensely! We would be eternally grateful!

Want to learn more?

Discover Your Personal Genius


We want to hear from you. Leave your comments below…


  • Rachel
    • Rachel
    • March 17, 2022 at 9:48 am

    This is an excellent idea and definitely worth trying. INFJ

  • Rachel
    • Rachel
    • March 17, 2022 at 6:55 am

    I agree with most of this. From listening to the podcasts I have realised I really need to work on my Fe. It has been a real eye opener to realise how much other peoples feelings effect me. I want to use this in a positive way. However it is really hard, slow and frustrating. On the other hand when I recognise my Se is like a 3 year old that needs to explore and feel free but has limitations, it allows me to feel better connected to the present but in an non pressured way because I know it’s not my strong point. Sometimes all it takes is to put my walking boots on and go out alone. Climb a hill and be out in nature. Then I can go back to my life and what needs to be done feeling a bit lighter. Other times I go for a walk with my extrovert friends and feel better able to connect with them. It is also the part of me that can play tricks on me. Tell me to take risks I’m not quite ready for. Usually it’s about my Ni stepping in and insisting on smaller steps. I think Se can really help you move forward. I’m not quite sure how yet though.

  • Rachel
    • Rachel
    • March 16, 2022 at 7:59 pm

    I’m also INFJ. I struggle expressing anger or even to recognise it in myself. I am so quick to see another person’s point of view, that it is only much later I realise what I feel, when everyone has moved on. My own feelings don’t always make sense to me so I suppress them. I realise this isn’t healthy and I’m working on it. I am actually much better in my 40’s at recognising my emotions and accepting them but sometimes I regress to my younger self, which results in me felling resentful and then guilt.

  • Bobby Young
    • Bobby Young
    • September 23, 2021 at 4:25 pm

    Just drawing a correlation with the Enneagram here. From what little I know, anger is related to types 8, 9 & 1.

    As an INFJ I’ve spent much of my life struggling with anger… such as, when it is okay to feel, IF is it okay to feel. I have spent so long trying to reject the emotion that I have learned to equate it with degradation, etc.

    Yet, I know there are SOME times when “righteous anger” is okay and even necessary. Such as, when Jesus or Nazareth overturned tables or money changers within the temple. My struggle is the thin line between self-righteous anger and righteous anger, and how to see the difference in the moment.

    Not to attach this entirely to religion; it is just an example exhibited by an INFJ (Jesus Christ) that, regardless of personal belief, also changed the world as we know it.

  • Margaret Newcombe
    • Margaret Newcombe
    • April 15, 2021 at 2:11 am

    Do you know any INFP s who can speak for INFP type today as Isabelle Myers did in Gifts Differing? I totally under stand one thing out of this . I have a lot of anger that has been directed at myself as a result of church experiences.Ive spent a lot of time searching it all out. I just want to say that I learn a lot from the old testament and Jewish people …why there is so much anger and jealousy directed towards their iincredible abilities to survive and make money and live with style and grace for so long as a nation . Emotions are real and God is not confined to passive peace and lovely happiness! He is hyper passionate , intense and yet slow to anger. I prefer to transfer my anger into passion these days. Was Jesus able to express a special type of anger for the temple place of His presence being violated? I think the real God and the real Jesus is the greatest expression of emotion the earth will ever see. I believe He created the earth and humanity and the universe out of a very intense LOVE.As an INFP I see so much to be angry about and thank you for helping me gather some gems to ponder here, though I get overwhelmed by INFJ and ENTP musings and want to get up and do my paintings and guitar practice and plan other mundane activities .I am inspired but will need to listen again …Ne is often to quick for me ! I dont see the need to put in prose what I can say in paint poetry and song etc. God bless you both.

Leave a comment

This site is protected by reCAPTCHA and the Google Privacy Policy and Terms of Service apply.