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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about the unique social challenges facing NT women personality types (INTJ – INTP – ENTP – ENTJ).
In this podcast you’ll find:
- The common thread between the INTJ, INTP, ENTP and ENTJ female types.
- Your double hit of being Intuitive and a Thinker as a woman.
- What are common challenges NT women deal with?
- Why are their challenges not talked about much?
- Why you are under-represented as an NT woman.
- What do you do when you don’t show up according to societal expectations?
- The overtime NT women put in trying to meet others where they are at.
- Why do NT women keep facing exhaustion and social failure?
- How much energy do you use trying to be more feminine?
- How being told “you’re the problem” affects NT women.
- Why is sisterhood so valued by you, yet often elusive?
- The blending mask that NT women wear.
- What happens when that mask comes off?
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The damaging strategy cycles NT women go through.
- The ENTP woman’s strategies to alleviate offense.
- Why an ENTJ woman diminishes her strong energy.
- The ego hits INTJ and INTP women take from fitting in.
- Why you feel so alone in your female NT challenges.
- How you feel unstoppable inside yet self-diminish socially.
- Why the NT woman’s cure is worse than the disease.
- Overidentifying with your wiring and the drama triangle.
- How do you navigate through your wounds?
- Becoming a bridge through your masculine and feminine energy.
- How you come off in your emotional and thought labor.
- How can camaraderie help you?
- Ways you can grow as an NT woman.
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Podcast - Episode 0352 - Building Self Esteem Regardless Of Type
Podcast - Episode 0354 - Social Challenges NT Women Face - Part 2 (INTJ - INTP - ENTP - ENTJ)
42 comments
It is not uncommon for ENFP 6 so types to identify as Thinkers in Myers-Briggs as they are in the head triad of the Enneagram and information instinctively filters through thought first.
An observation. Your mileage may vary.
A
Ironically for an NT, this podcast hit me right in the feels. I have never felt so seen and validated, and I have to express my thanks. Even though I’m intj, not entp, so much of what you said felt completely familiar. All the holding back, all the people who think they’re meeting you halfway when they’re nowhere close. I almost cringed when Joel started talking about how everyone struggles with some type of labor. I think he’s got a good point, but I’ve had so many feelers minimize or misunderstand the extra layer of effort an NT woman puts in by telling me “everyone feels that way sometimes” that I threw up my hands in frustration. Despite that moment, I really felt seen by everything you had to say and mostly love Joel’s way of teasing out the nuanced feelings and intents behind the kind of human interactions that can be such a source of pain for me.
Hi Antonia and Joel,
Thank you so much for bringing this topic up. What a relief to hear other NT women are feeling the same sense of being misunderstood constantly. I am an almost 25 years old INTJ woman, and I know how difficult it was to grow up fully embracing myself completely unconditionally. I developed pretty severe mental disorder symptoms given my genetic predisposition during this process (i.e., eating disorder, psychotic states, etc.). The wounding is so deep that I had to switch my major several times during undergrad to study psychology to heal myself, which took another extra two years to earn my degree while studying in a foreign country not using my mother language.
On the other hand, learning all the theoretical stuff on a conceptual level is completely different from truly getting the inner wisdom and to be healed. I’ve been in psychotherapy for a while and am studying a master on psychoanalytic theories right now, still unsure of what exactly will be the thing to bring to the world to get the greatest fulfillment in my future career and to find my comfortable space.
Anyway, all in all, I know we can all figure this out gradually. Keep doing the inner work, and letting it be manifested onto the external world.
I discovered I was INTJ on my 63rd birthday several years ago on your website. That was the BEST birthday present ever since I had always thought that either I was insane or from another planet. In this podcast you absolutely NAILED IT in describing my daily/lifetime struggles. I have literally damaged my jaw joints from keeping my teeth clenched most of the day at my job because I either make people mad or they just don’t have a clue what I am talking about. Thank you for all your input and hard work in sharing these personalities! I know I am an unusual sort but at least I know I am not alone! I wish there were some sort of chat room situation for people like us! Thanks again.
As an I/ENTJ woman I definitely find myself making friends with most males easily. Except for the few who seem to automatically hate me. I don’t feel like I fit in, but I enjoy and love the company of other women. With maturity I have learned to recognize when I have stepped on toes, but still resent having to explain myself when I have done nothing wrong. I think my biggest failure may be reining myself in so those who might appreciate me for me, never get to see the real me in average social situations. I think you two are great and appreciate your insights so much. Thank you! You gave me a lot to think about.