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In this episode Joel and Antonia talk about how to manage energy based on your personality type.
In this podcast you’ll find:
Time management isn’t always about managing time. It’s about managing energy.
The management of energy is key to understanding everything else we do. Energy is very important for us as people.
The world is plagued by stress and burnout.
This requires us to manage the information we take in, who we communicate with, and the way we manage priorities and to-do lists.
Time/energy management is not a one-size-fits-all approach.
What works for one person may not work for another.
Begin by making sure the energy in the food we take in is high quality and nutritious.
Make sure to get enough rest and R&R.
How does each type manage energy?
8 Cognitive Functions in MBTI system.
4 are perceiving processes – how we learn info. What we find interesting to observe and explore.
4 are judging functions – decision making. Natural vetting process to determine the value of things.
4 Cognitive Functions are particularly influential to each type. These we call the Cognitive Function Stack.
2 will be our biggest strengths – 2 will be our biggest weaknesses.
Each Cognitive Function has a mirror opposite. If you are using one function, its direct opposite will be getting ignored.
We spend 10,000+ hours working on our strengths.
Driver is dominant cognitive function. Flow State. How we see ourselves.
Copilot rounds us out and keeps us balanced. If Driver is an introverted perceiving process, the Copilot will be an extraverted judging process.
Copilot isn’t a flow state. It is a conscious process that doesn’t feel as good to use as the Driver. It is a growth process because it will round us out as individuals.
There are 2 passengers behind Driver and Copilot. Exact opposites of Driver and Copilot.
Behind Copilot is the 10 year old process. This is where we go to in times of defensiveness. It can become a very insidious energy drain.
Behind Driver is 3 year old process. This is the least sophisticated part of you. Don’t let it run the house, just get its occasional needs met.
Driver gives us energy when we are using it. This makes our energy needs unique to type.
Copilot has some skill. It can give us energy, but it can also rob us of energy.
Driver/Copilot used in tandem can create flow and huge amounts of energy.
Focusing on Copilot and singling it out as a growth exercise can cause fatigue. Like building muscle.
Stress can be caused by over engagement. Constantly burning hot. Inefficient energy loss.
Burnout is a lack of engagement. You’re done. Nothing left to give.
Stress comes when Driver is trying to solve the problem and it doesn’t have the right tool for the job.
Burnout happens when we don’t feel we are allowed to use our driver. If we are in a context where we can’t be in our Driver we won’t be able to regenerate our batteries. So we will eventually burnout.
(Stress and burnout can have causes unrelated to type (diet, nutrition, temporary life challenges, etc. If there are no obvious reasons for stress/burnout in life, then it is time to look at your Cognitive Functions and find out what is missing.)
Driver/Copilot form an unstoppable team.
If every day is a bad day then you may not be exercising your dominant process enough.
Create an environment that honors your Driver. Like the little daisy that pushes through concrete, our flow state will force its way to the surface.
- INFJ & INTJ: Driver is Ni – the opposite of Se. Ni works the best when it is not gettting sensory input. INxJs often complain of lifelong insomnia. If they aren’t honoring the needs of their Driver during the day, it will wait until they are quietly in bed before firing up and getting the attention it needs. This puts the person in flow and gives them energy which makes it hard for them to sleep. INxJs should allow themselves some sensory deprivation earlier in the day so their minds can relax when it’s time for bed.
Driver always needs to be supported.
- ESFP leads with Sensation. This process requires sensory stimulation. A job that removes sensory stimulation (desk jockey, cubicle rat, etc) will cause depression and fatigue to an ESFP. Solutions: Ride a bike to work, Play basketball with some friends at lunch, engage with the community in some team sports, go to the gym.
Strengthening the Copilot and gaining ability to use it in conjunction with the Driver give the Driver the adult companionship it needs.
Oftentimes, we find it more comfortable to pair our Driver with our 10 yr old. Driver will have either a Extraverted/Introverted attitude. Copilot rounds us out by having opposite I/E. 10 year old is opposite of Copilot, so it goes back to being of the same attitude as the Driver. So, it is easier to use at times than the Copilot.
We can cruise along like this for awhile, but eventually a barrier will occur that a child can’t help us overcome. As stress builds the 10 year old becomes more unreliable.
Look at exercising the Copilot as going to the gym. And using 10 year old sitting on the couch as eating potato chips.
Exercise gives us energy. Not exercising and eating fatty foods robs us of energy.
When you do decide to exercise or use your Copilot it may seem really hard at first, but the muscles grow and it becomes easier.
10 yr old can hijack us if it is completely ignored or dishonored in some way. Whatever is making the 10 yr old feel icky needs to be solved or it becomes an energy drain.
- Harmony – Fe – 10 yr old can feel “dirty” or dishonored if interpersonal relationships devolve somehow. It can hijack the Driver and Copilot – all mental and emotional real estate – until a resolution is reached.
- Effectiveness – Te – 10 yr old can feel dishonored if projects don’t get completed.
If there is something you need to handle and you aren’t handling it a lot of psychological energy will be drained.
- INTJs lead with Perspectives – Ni. Their Copilot is Te. 10 yr old is Authenticity – Fi. Fi is about how things impact the user on an emotional level. The average INTJ has a lot of protective mechanisms here, but if you dig down you may find a lot of offense or injury. To clean out Fi and get back into a fully functioning Te, the INTJ needs to remove the hurt pride or fear of injury. Energy can be drained by old pain.
- INxJs perfectionism usually comes down to a dishonored 10 yr old. INTJs Fi can be about artistic expressiveness, so to an INTJ it can show itself as “I’m the only one who can do it right!” INFJs 10 yr old is Accuracy – Ti. Precision. Perfectionism can be a massive energy hog.
Last process in car model is 3 yr old.
Top performers always need rest and the 3 yr old allows our Driver some time off.
We don’t want to live in the 3 yr old because it causes burnout.
But we can use it strategically and it gives our driver a much needed break.
Schedule time to be in 3 yr old.
- For a Memory (Si) inferior – watch old movies, listen to music from the past, read a favorite novel, look at old photographs, etc.
We can manage our energy by fully comprehending how our Cognitive Function Stack interacts and either robs or replaces energy.
Resources Referenced in this Podcast
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26 comments
I enjoyed this podcast. I took the test and came out as ISFP though I relate a lot to INFP and INFJ as well, so… Hmm. I work as a nurse in an ER which exhausts me to no end (but I enjoy it). Not sure if this had to do with my 10 yr old but a lot of times I start to feel insecure and down on myself and feel like an outsider. Any advice?
Cool, thanks. I’m an INTP, so it likely won’t be quite as effective for me. But I’ll still read it. For one thing, it will give me information about how other people work, especially TJ’s, which is always interesting. But also I often can pick up one or two tips from books like that, even if they aren’t suited to me in many aspects.
Also, I have always loved astronomy, simply for its own sake, for as long as I can remember. Right now my job is in academia in a fairly free environment, no,strict hours and I can just sit in a library all day…as long as there are people around me. I HATE sitting in an office! I live the camaraderie of a class-like, team-like environment. I quit my job at a law firm because of the technical minutiae I had to go through. I kind have to do that now, still, yet it’s much more manageable because of the freedom of the environment. Hope this helps. I pray for an answer from you guys. Been struggling to settle on a type for at least 6 years now. Thank you, Evelyn.
In my opinion… I think “Getting Things Done” will work well for ESTJs and ENTJs. It will be AMAZING for ISTJs and INTJs. Other types may or may not get mileage from it. But the four TJ types will be served the best.
Antonia…..Heeeeelp!!! After this podcast, I’m much more confused than ever! It seems I might prefer NE over NI after all!!!! Your description of how you engage your 3 year old fits me to a T!!!. I have programs that I keep going back to when I’m feeling a certain way, I watch them over and over again. Certain music that I already know I like. I will revisit it again and again.
I was confused between ENFP and INFJ not only because your tests keep coming out INFJ but because I’m 100% sure Ti plays a very significant role in my mind, especially in the last 10 years or so (I’m in my early thirties now). I have been doing lots of philosophy and “logic” work in that decade, but not out of any deliberate developmental intention. I just was driven by an innate, insatiable curiosity! When I was in my early to late teens, I was driven by a similar curiosity but was focused more on reading about diverse religious cultures around the world and also about ancient History which I totally loooooved! When I was around 10-11, it was comics like Tin-Tin, all those puzzles he solved! When I was smaller, it was fairy tales! I was obsessed! I became our school librarian’’s favourite kid for being so well behaved in the library even though I got in trouble everywhere else for noise-making!
Now looking back at all that, I see that I have always been obsessed with imbibing information but what sort has changed over the years.
Another thing…Ever since my teens, I have been incredibly argumentative! It’’s a shame spot for me, because it was always shunned and I lost friendships over it and couldn’t seem to stop. It’s only in the last 3 years or so that I have somehow managed to soften that urge in me where I can let things slide in order to maintain relationships and even so, I will occasionally still mess up! I would like me to be a demure attractive fi female, but alas! I can’t be one. It has been so shameful to me. So unladylike. Not to mention how horrible I am at housework!
I was assuming these are TI and SE weaknesses, that I am INFJ, because I am thoroughly introverted, don’t feel the need to explore my immediate physical environment. Will use a road 100 times before I notice something rather concupicuous on it…the 101th time! People around me usually think i am joking when i say I express surprise at that strange tree or building or whatever, which apparently has been there for months. I thought yhis surely MUST mean i am NI dominant. I explore the environment in books (and people too, in conversations), not my physical location! Some people have said that I ask sooooo many questions, so sometimes I keep my questions to myself. I love travelling on occasion, but it’s not a dire need. I just really enjoy it, as long as it foes not involve chores (no hiking or camping for me, thank you very much!!!) I love to travel through europe in comfortsble trains. And i am a chronic procrastinator.
Lastly, I assumed I was NF because I love people and people-causes first and foremost.
Now I wonder if I may be neither INFJ nor ENFP, nor NF at all but rather ENTP! !! LIKE Antonia? I have bought tools/packages for the INFJ….would there be a discount if I bought a second package for ENTP?? IF this is too long, I would appreciate if Antonia, you might consider doing a podcast about this? Thank you, Evelyn