[Video] How Introverted Sensing (Si) "Memory" Shows Up As A 3-Year-Old Inferior Cognitive Function

32 comments

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  • K
  • July 26, 2018 at 9:21 pm

  I am an infp and my sister an infj, and we always enjoy seeing how similar we are and yet how different that one letter makes us. Listening to your video and noticing that memory is my 10 year old, but it is nowhere in her stack reveals, for the first time, why it is that I have a zillion items riddled with nostalgia, whereas she throws away older things (including toys that were precious to me, that I passed on to her out of love) the way you would throw away an orange rind. Really interesting.

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  • Louise Texada
  • July 27, 2018 at 1:50 pm

  Hi Joel, I am an ENFP and I totally relate to your experience! When my father died and my mother moved out of our childhood home, and again, decades later when my stepfather passed and my mother moved to assisted living I felt a lot of conflict between that sense of responsibility to preserve memories (that weren’t even mine) and ownership (of things I didn’t need). Initially, it was a sense of being OVERLY responsible IMHO…like a 3 year old overfaced with a project. Gradually, with the help of a mentor, I was able to use my authenticity to “keep” what resonated with me as authentic and to let go of the rest. I felt best when I could allow things to be “rehomed” where they were truly wanted and authentic for that next steward, whether it be pictures with another family member, items with someone excited or grateful to get them, clothing for someone that needed them, that sort of dynamic. And, I “let myself off the hook” realizing that love is always a gift, not a burden. Great video!!! Thank you.

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  • Julie Pageau
  • July 27, 2018 at 4:01 am

  I am an INFP. Seeing those really old and detailed photos, I feel thrill. Cannot imagine how cool that would be to me to see and feel that even closer. I hand’t Seen before that many so old photos gathered together so carefully. This is a real piece of history in your hands. I think I feel like this could be a way to feel like going back in time a little bit and my copilot exploration is also there for a big part of the thrill I see in that. I love really old stuff with old feel for that same reason. Thank you very much for sharing. Feel free to share more with close photo captures. I so much love that kind of things. This is so cool!

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  • marie carr
  • July 26, 2018 at 8:49 pm

  Thank you Joel for sharing a portion of your family history and the beautiful home you are recording this from. Although I found it interesting and admire your grandmother for maintaining such a detailed visual record of your family roots. I find myself as an INFJ with mixed feelings. Having been brought up in an orphanage and have zero photos of myself from birth to age 18, a whole section of my life seems to be invisible from a photo point of view. Not really sure if it would be of real benefit for me to be reminded of those dark miserable days, so perhaps in my case no photos no visual memories is the best option. I am happy for you that you get to know your family’s lineage. Thanks for sharing . :-)

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  • Rachel Gall
  • July 27, 2018 at 12:14 am

  I think I’m an ENFP.. we’re in the process of moving and I’ve been sorting out old boxes. I’ve seen things from childhood, high school, college, and early married life, first kid born and I do get overwhelmed. It’s like you said, a feeling of “burden” and responsibility. I’m actually quite good at getting rid of stuff and purging (Te?), I’m the opposite of a hoarder. I think partly because I feel like it’s too much and it pins me down. I don’t take a lot of comfort in looking at the past. I always feel like I recoil, even if it’s good memories.

  I’m wondering if it’s because I know at that point in the past I wasn’t “tuned in” or, it feels like grasping at straws since it’s my blindspot. It’s like trying to fit broken pieces of glass into my life now, and I don’t know how to make sense of it.. why it matters to who I am. Authenticity of course helps tremendously. I definitely underestimate Si as a way to understand myself.

  A couple nuggets from packing:
  I recently got in touch with an old college roommate. We were not roommates very long or super close but we both have fond memories. We were able to catch up. She was in a bad place when I knew her, recovering from addiction, so I was glad to see she is doing well. A few days ago I was sorting through my stuff I found a letter from her from college, and a photo. If I had NOT heard from her I think that small tidbit would have felt … I dunno… weird. Like Ne would be dyyying to know what she’s up to, not out of a relational need but curiosity. I think I immediately connect the past to the moment… so Si on it’s own feels.. haunting? or something.

  I also had a chance to look at art assignments from college, and saw the progression I had from armature to mastery (totally Si right?) I cringed at assignments I had struggled with, but the great thing is it was a reminder that I was really good at drawing. It reminded me of WHO I am (Fi)… I realized I have been under-utilizing this skill as a graphic designer- Te makes me too pragmatic.

  My INFJ sister got me a drawing book to help me unleash Fi a while ago and looking through my old art (Si) has made me more sure of myself as an artist (Fi) and less dependent on Te (what works?) It’s so easy for ENFPs to find confidence in Te over Fi isn’t it?? This helped me see that more clearly.

  Ne and Si are both searching and looking for clues I think? I look constantly at the patterns now and emerging, so Si feels so stagnant and suffocating. It’s so strange how our blindspot is a burdensome creepy place for us, but it’s helpful to use it on occasion.