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In this episode, Joel and Antonia talk about dealing with trauma in your auxiliary copilot cognitive function.
In this podcast you’ll find:
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When our upbringing damages our Auxiliary (Co-pilot) cognitive function.
- How our Auxiliary function can be disowned or undermined.
- Why suppression is just one kind of Auxiliary wounding that happens.
- What is happening to our cognitive function mental wiring in childhood?
- Why negative feedback hurts our Auxiliary so much.
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Ways our Auxiliary function gets undermined in childhood.
- The painful downfall of an INTJ’s Extraverted Thinking (Effectiveness) due to unhealthy ENTP and INFJ parents.
- Why Auxiliary function undermining starts loops.
- Antonia (ENTP) recalls the shutdown of her Introverted Thinking (Accuracy) as a child.
- The Introverted Feeling (Authenticity) suppression Joel (ENFP) experienced as a kid.
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Auxiliary function trauma based on type:
- How IxTJs get shut down over and over.
- When ExTPs get told they are bad people.
- Why ExFPs keep hearing their feelings don’t matter.
- How IxFJs face too much disconnection.
- When ENxJs get continually discredited.
- Why INxPs are told they don’t make sense.
- How ESxJs struggle to deal with the past.
- When ISxPs face constant disapproval.
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Ways to heal your Auxiliary.
- Identifying your damage.
- How the H.A.T. model helps.
- Why acceptance makes the difference.
- The power of reframing your Auxiliary function.
- How you can love this part of yourself.
- The empowering exercise to start your healing.
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Moving towards Auxiliary growth:
- Why we are so sensitive with our Auxiliary function.
- What happens when you take your Auxiliary for granted.
- How your Auxiliary function growth is so valuable.
- Should we let our Auxiliary function make mistakes?
- When we stop trying to grow our Auxiliary.
- What growth comes after the Auxiliary?
- Dr. Dario Nardi’s cognitive function growth model (See Episode 0349)
- Why healing your Auxiliary is disruptive…and so worth it.
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18 comments
Great timing. I’ve been diving into this topic for the last few weeks. I learned to keep my Ne copilot hidden most of the time; it became second nature as it was unacceptable to my family and to many of my friends. I disguise why I’m travelling and what I’m studying, and to some friends it might be said with a laugh – “you know how I’m into some weird stuff” – or to others I’ll refer to workshops I’m going to as being about a sort of “meditation”, because most people have heard of that and it sounds normal. Then there are a few intuitive friends for whom it all is normal, and I can remove the filters when talking to them.
Agh! I have to comment about the end chatter. Every time I hear Antonia go into her best mode, providing the highest value stuff, cleanly explained, and without any extraneous nonsense or mistaken analogies that confuse the argument, she apologizes for talking to much. Please stop doing that.
I believe there are people listening to this podcast not for Antonia’s clean explanations, because I see reviewers appreciate Joel, and I have heard from friends who’ve attended workshops in person that people really adore Joel, and I am very sure he has a ton to offer the world. And I believe that his muddling of things on the podcast is probably valuable for me in that it allows me to understand what is not true and highlights better what Antonia is trying to say which Joel regularly makes blurry and less valuable.But like, for the love of god, pleAse stop apologizing for being articulate, clear, and very good at explaining things.
And in turn I promise I will keep trying to work on appreciating enfps, something I admit I struggle with.
-entp
This is why it took so long for me to test as ISFP.